Where do I go to meet the best men? Why do the guys I like so much just stop calling and how do I get the guy I like to get to the next level? These are questions that so many women find themselves asking and it can be so tough to find the right guy! How To Get The Guy from coach Matthew Hussey is the secret to getting immediate results in your love life. Our dating tips are designed specifically for women, with knowledge drawn from working with men seeking love themselves. We know how men work, their thoughts, their feelings and what makes them tick and I know how to hook them in for good. So check out our 10 amazing videos with the best relationship tips for women.
I am dating a guy in a distance relationship for about three months, at the beggining we felt unbelievable connection soulmate like, he said he wants to marry and have children, he was caring and sweet (flowers, gifts, lots of time together). However I know he cheated on me at the very beginning of dating (I forgived him because that was very fresh relation).
My ex boyfriend are both in our mid-20s and dated for 6 months until he broke up with me out of the blue when I came back from a vacation almost two months ago. He did it via text, blaming it on mental health issues and two days later called me to meet up and talk about it. The whole time he was being extremely affectionate. I told him we could be friends but saw him on tinder that night and told him that was hurtful and cut contact. I realized that I had been acting insecure and reactive towards him and focused on being a more laid-back and positive me. Almost 4 weeks later I contacted him via text. He responded positively and I called him that week and he said he would love to hang out, then went cold on me when I tried to confirm plans. I saw him at the bar that night with other girls and kept my cool going up to him asking how he’d been, then went back into no contact after he ignored my text for a day. A couple weeks later I called him in a moment of weakness but he didn’t answer. He texted me that morning though and we started chatting a bit via text and Snapchat for a few days, and I asked him to hang out. We hung out at his place and just watched tv and talked. I felt confident and he seemed nervous. It seemed to be going great and he was heavily flirting with me, reminiscing and talking about future plans. I was sweet but playing it cool and being skeptical, not flirting too much. After I left he texted me thanking me for seeing him, telling me how awesome and sexy I am. The next day I called him to get lunch but he didn’t answer and texted me 20 mins later saying he was coaching and we had a quick, positive convo. That was a week and a half ago now and he’s ignored a text I sent him of a funny video the other day. Then, last night he posts a Snapchat of himself with another girl, which he never posts them. Did I scare him off for good with initiating too much contact? What’s the best course of action? I want to give it another chance because we had a loving relationship.
Immediately pump the brakes on everything you’ve currently been doing, and completely go MIA for a bit. The key is to pull back just a little bit, and give your guy the opportunity to really miss you. This pull back technique will not only make him crave you, but it will make him wonder if there’s another guy in your life who has your attention. He will soon realize that he misses having you in his life, and he doesn’t want to run the risk of another guy swooping in to steal you away! It won’t be long before he’s finally making things official with you.
One of the best ways to make a guy miss you is to have fun without him. I know, it sounds ridiculous, but your guy wants to be the only thing that makes you happy. If you’re having fun without him (a girls’ night out, some really cool skydiving lessons, etc.), then he’s going to want to be part of the fun. Men like to be the ones to make you smile, and if you’re smiling without him he’ll notice and he’ll pay more attention.

How to make him commit to a relationship, you might be wondering? You have decided that it is time to stop playing games and get serious with the man in your life but he might be putting up a resistance. Stack up some tips up your sleeves, and he’ll be ready for a long-term relationship in no time. Stop wondering how to get him to commit to a relationship and read these awesome tips, but primarily, guidelines on how to get a guy to commit is really not that hard, that is if HE really wants to.

Italiano: Riconquistare la Tua Ex, Português: Conseguir Seu ou Sua Ex de Volta, Deutsch: Deine Ex zurück gewinnen, Français: reconquérir son ex, Русский: вернуть своего бывшего, 中文: 与你的前男友或前女友重新开始, Nederlands: Je ex terugwinnen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji bývalou dívku zpět, Español: recuperar a tu ex, 日本語: 別れた恋人とよりを戻す, Bahasa Indonesia: Mendapatkan Mantan Pacar Anda Kembali, العربية: استعادة شريكك السابق, ไทย: ได้แฟนเก่ากลับมา, Tiếng Việt: Giành lại người yêu cũ, 한국어: 전 애인과 다시 결합하는 방법, हिन्दी: अपने एक्स को वापस पायें
hi kevin..my ex broke up with me after 5 years that we've been together. it has been 3 months since she left, i have been chasing her since then but now i want to do NO CONTACT. do i still have a chance after every i did to chase her? i became needy, desperate and insecure before we broke up because i was working abroad, when i arrived home she broke up with me and i was devastated because i haven't seen her for 7 months. i tried to chase her but she ignored me all the time. i left my country again to work, I tried to send her messages when I left. she's responding but she's acting cold and trying to avoid me. now i decided to do the no contact, do i still have a chance to win her back??
You know, the thoughtful gestures that make her feel valued and loved, such as: holding her hand, kissing her hello, saying “I love you”, pulling her in for a cuddle, complimenting her when she has made an effort to look good (or has been extra friendly to your awful Aunt Peggy) answering her questions, really listening to her, remembering small details about what she likes, saying thank you, and of course, surprising her with a little something special  – just because.

The best new boyfriend advice is to drop any effort on your part to close that space. Resist the temptation to ask him what’s wrong or to step up your efforts in order to get a response from him. Don’t call him or email him or drop by his place. Let him make the choice to come to you. When he does, it also makes you feel better. It makes you feel desired by him.
As an older man, I’m not sure if I can explain what’s happening and how relationships have changed over the past 40 years or so. Young men, like my son and his friends, view relationships differently from their fathers and are in the process of changing the relationship landscape forever. In my day, marriage was assumed and divorce was rare. Today, divorce is assumed, along with alimony and marriage, is to be avoided at all costs. Your boyfriends might not be pulling away from you as much as they are pulling away from a society that views them as disposable… Read more »
There's a fine line between playing a little hard to get and acting totally indifferent. When you're out to dinner, make sure not to constantly check your phone or dart your eyes around the room. It's dating 101, but show you're interested in what he has to say and ask about his life. "Men appreciate and want to be with someone who makes them feel amazing," Trespicio says. "If you rock his world and he loves being with you, why would he ever want to be with anyone else?"

First of all getting back together with your ex because you are lonely is not a good idea. What you are experiencing is just one of the symptoms of breakup. Everyone feels like this. And it doesn’t last forever. Secondly, acting like this is only going to make your ex less attracted to you. And even if they do feel pity for you, they are not going to get back together because of it.
Take a leap of faith and do exactly what your ex suggests that you should do to move on. Obviously you shouldn’t take it all the way and really move on altogether or never reach out to them again. But let them doubt for a few weeks or even a few months if you were on the brink or divorced after a long marriage; push them to the brink to see if they are really capable of assuming their words.

He suddenly wanted a break, said i would get too jealous and needed space, I fought him so he said nvm I’m too aggressive. Then I kept messaging him and he said he was seriously going to give me a chance but that now that I freaked him out. I had never reacted this way w him but I really did not want to lose him. He used to love me so much and showed so much affection but it was so much that it kind of got to me and I loved him a lot for it, he eventually needed space because he went through alcohol problems in the past and needed to stay active in helping and running since he is sponsored. Eventually he told me no, he will not promise me he was taking a break anymore.

I agree with you! It’s ok if they need space, but I am done putting my life on hold wating for him to see if he wants me. Life is too damn short to be miserable. This article gives you the reasons he’s pulling away. What ya need to say when you see him again is…ive been out enjoying myself. While you were needing your space…I’ve met someone who actually wants to spend time with me. Hope you find someone who will put up with your disappearing act. In the meantime I have a life.

If you sense that all your efforts to improve your relationship are not bearing fruit, don’t delay the inevitable.  Yes, being single can appear scary at first, but better alone than stuck in a relationship that is draining the joy and spark out of you.  You don’t want to wake up at fifty or sixty years old to discover that you’ve wasted your love on a guy that never appreciated what you had to offer.
Yesterday, I asked her how she felt cause it felt like things were up in the air. She told me "I dont think its up in the air. I thought I was clear". The. we got into a fight about it. She said she couldnt just not talk to me anymore and that I meant way too much to her to do that and that she'll stop talking to me since it was confusing. I told her that it doesnt feel like I truly meant the world to her and that I deserved another chance and that we should just talk it out. She replied after work saying "we already talked" and I just told her "Youre right. Take care of yourself" and she said the same back.
I would suggest that you try to stay focused and pick yourself up from this first. She may have the 'pick of the litter', but keep in mind that she did love you through the period you were together and probably still does have certain feelings for you. However, because she is in the new relationship with the other guy which is 'novel', she definitely has taken a stronger interest there at this point because its still a new thing. Work on improving yourself now because if ever there comes a point where you and her cross paths, you would want to be in the position to make a strong impression and to test her true feelings with the other boyfriend she's now with.
I was in a fwb relationship with a man that I’m compatible with. But his ex wife and ex gf of 14 years both cheated on him. He never wants to date or have a relationship again. He says he’s un loveable too. It breaks my heart because I’m very much in love with him. He brok up with me 2 years ago because he knew I was in love with him without saying. We hadn’t talked again til last week. We had wonderful exciting sex. He said he hadn’t been with anyone in a long time.

Did you know that you can have a direct effect on his testosterone levels? By making him feel respected, admired and manly, his testosterone levels will rise… as will his sex-drive. By making him feel weak and small, his testosterone levels will decrease along with his sex-drive. You want to become the fuel for his testosterone by making him feel loved, respected and needed.
Take a vacation. Jetting off with nothing but a bikini and the promise of a postcard gives him a small taste of life minus you. Plus, the freedom to flirt when you're ostensibly single cuts both ways, and if he's into you, that'll stick in his craw. "When my girlfriend told me she was going on a cruise with three of her friends, I figured, cool — three weeks of bachelor days ahead," says Todd James* (names have been changed), a 29-year-old New York City public-relations executive. But then he saw how excited she was about the trip. "She kept talking about how they were going to get crazy — and two of her friends didn't have boyfriends. I doubted Amy was going to sit on the boat drinking pina coladas alone while they hit the town." Long story short: The night before she left, he initiated The Talk. "It was sort of a preemptive strike. I didn't want her to cheat on me," he said. "But it also made me think about losing her, and how I knew those three weeks would be pretty lonely. I did enough running around in college."
Me any ex dated for over a year. He recently stopped communicating with me about four months ago. He will not give me a reason to his decision. I’ve begged and pleaded the last four months. He responds periodically but will not answer directly if he has broken up with me. My question is simply “are we done” “are we not dating anymore” etc. he never responds to those questions of why but if I say good morning or something general he will respond (sometimes) but takes hours to do so. I’ve just recently started to use the no contact rule, since yesterday. I do desire to be with him but I’m so emotional and I think I need to get myself together and calm down. I imagine he has started a relationship with someone else but he won’t answer that question either. Do you think it’s a chance after the 30 days that this situation has a chance? I will with all my might not contact him and work on being stronger regardless if we rekindle or not. Our relationship was good, not strong though we’ve never had major issues I do realize the lack of communication with each other if there were issues. What are your suggestions to this? Thank you

If you’re missing him, odds are he’s used to you fawning over him. Switch things up when you see him and treat him like a good friend instead of the man who’s keeping your mind occupied all of the time. Hold back the feelings you have for him even thought it may be difficult. Be polite, courteous, and not flirtatious before saying goodbye during your chance encounter. This is more effective if you have another man by your side. When he realizes he doesn’t have a hold on you, then the wheels will start turning and you'll be on his mind. Of course, this may also backfire and get him to think that you’re not interested in him so practice discretion when going this route. If he’s sensitive and this could hurt him emotionally it’s best to keep other guys at a distance, try the other options listed.


maybe you should lead someone on for as long as you do before showing that kind of attention back. and you wonder why men think their not good enough for you resulting in pulling away. not being funny but too many women out there expect the men to try try and try only for THEM to get the so called ‘reward’. ever considered making it a mutual thing and not all female onesided letting the man feel like he has to earn some kind of reward..
Once you’ve rocked his world, don’t say, “OK, I rocked you, now pay me back with your lifelong commitment.” That won’t work. Show him that he must earn that privilege. And keep earning it. I’m not talking about berating, withholding or any other mind-f*ck thing we all despise. (Not sure what I mean? Find out why “you go girl” thinking is the worst advice.)

Great article (as usual!). What are some ways women can inspire a guy to realize his ultimate potential as a man? My go to was to go to the deep, dark secrets, but from reading your articles that is a no-no and I should leave his issues alone. Asking questions seems to put guys on guard and make him and me feel like I am an investigator. You have previously said to let guys open up to you, does that go for sharing their hopes/dreams as well? Or how can I reach him on a deeper level?


Me and my girlfriend of 2 years broke up in September a week before our 2 year anniversary and my birthday. I have tried doing no contact but have talked to her a few times and even gotten coffee with her just to chat. I have tried my best to continue on contact but she recently just texted me asking if I would start coming back to church. She said it would be nice to see me at church again. A little context we used to go to church together all the time and are part of a church community that we met at and started dating because of. I really miss going to the church and miss the friends i made there. Should i continue to do no contact? I dont quite know what i should message her in response to her asking me to come back to church without coming off as rude. and I don't want her to think im mad at her by not responding to her at all. What should I do?
However, something I’ve noticed men despise about their dates—it’s when their date expects them to pay for the meal, because they’re male. This doesn’t just pull them away, it turns them off. This problem manifests itself if they feel like you haven’t appreciated their efforts. Don’t be that girl. The first impression you give is usually the only impression you’re remembered for, especially if it doesn’t get past the first date. Most men aren’t so keen to fund the lifestyle of someone they’re not sure what their intentions are: “What exactly does she want me for me?” Or, “Is she only after me for my money?”
You need to rely on your intuitions when you meet someone new. Nevertheless, avoid being judgmental or picky from the beginning. It is vital for you to be open-minded. In fact, you should stop overanalyzing every single aspect. Things work out in a better way when you take it easy for the first few weeks. This will also help you to get to know the guy better.
SIDE NOTE: One thing I want you to see here is that to your ex or any other girl, your DMV/ perceived superiority is as high as your behavior makes it, and is only partially related to your job, income, looks etc. This is why no guy reading this has any excuse for not being able to become the kind of guy his ex wants for a relationship. Enticing her back quickly into a new relationship/fresh start can be achieved by following my 6 step program.
Just a heads up as this is an extremely important section. Remember when we talked abut how you are going to implement the no contact rule for about a month (30 days?) Yes, well you are not going to just sit on your butt and twiddle your thumbs during this time. No, you are going to work towards your goal of a new and better relationship by focusing on the one thing you can control, yourself!
...And then I got back with one of my exes. I know, it pains me to say it out loud. Not because they're the worst person on earth and I was ashamed, but because I went back on my word. My point is: it's easy to claim revisiting a former relationship is a bad idea and to dish out advice to your pals like you're the moral compass of the group, but when it happens to you, you realise actually it's not always such a ridiculous idea.
The new girl backed off after a while, and I will admit after my ex got evolved things changed a little bit because I wasn't sure what she would do. I was kinda always looking over my shoulder as well as old WAR wounds came back. The thing is me and the new girl loved each other a lot and was on the same page, even talked about moving in together after only being together for a month. It seemed so effortless.
Your relationship with a special guy has come and gone, but now you want him back. It's not unheard of for a couple to get back together after they've taken time away from each other, so don't give up hope. Just be sure to put plenty of thought into the reasons you broke up before attempting to get back together, as this can help you make the relationship work the second time around.
If your guy is hesitant to commit to you, going away on a trip with a few of your girlfriends will definitely catch his attention. The whole time you’re away, he’ll be driving himself crazy wondering if you’re meeting and hooking up with other guys. This is your time to completely forget about him, and just live in the moment! Feel free to send him a text here and there to let him know how much fun you’re having, but don’t stay glued to your phone. Give him time to miss you, and we guarantee as soon as you step foot back in town, he’ll be anxious to make you his girlfriend once and for all!

Don’t change your plans for him. First off, you need to maintain who you are when you’re in a relationship, so start out dating this guy by setting some ground rules: some activities and events will not be changed because they are important to you. You will fit him in when your schedule allows. A confident woman won’t alter what she’s planned to do for a guy.
Now, a lot of men will not be in a relationship if they don’t feel secure within themselves. This is especially true if the woman is someone beautiful and independent. For example, a man may pull away if he is not financially secure at the moment. This is something that may help him feel superior, confident, and not wonder if he is good enough for you. Also, he may have certain health issues that he is not comfortable telling you about until he figures things out on his own. Another reason could be instability and or unhappiness related to his job. This can be an additional source of stress and men tend to feel as though they need to feel confident or protected with their primary sources of freedom: Money, Health, and Work.
However, for women it is always nice when a guy does the romantic thing and buys you presents etc. So if you have been in a relationship with your man for a while and this is happening to you, then you can also use Slade Shaw’s questioning technique to get him to realise on another level that he needs to pay attention to you in a more romantic way.
But now, he is pulling away. Slowly but surely. I’m so lost. I’m trying to give him space but I’m scared he will go away forever. I don’t want that so I’m keeping my shut but I’m just so confused. I don’t know what to do. I love him dearly so much still (I have not expressed that as I’m conscious of the consequences of these things especially with an ex and what we went through).

Right now, he probably feels overwhelmed by your actions which resulted in him feeling that you were pushy. I suggest taking a step back for now and go into no contact. Spend this time picking yourself up emotionally and mentally, and focus on doing things to keep yourself happy in the meantime. You could reach out again sometime down the road in a more casual manner if you feel ready, and this means to avoid having expectations and being okay with whatever happens.
I'm a bit nervous about how to approach this, I know I have to be light, to look like I'm making changes (which I am), to look positive and happy even though I'm not always like that. But there is a part of me that really wants to be serious and tell her to bet for me, not to take me back (I know I don't have to be pushy at all) but to allow me to show her how I'm overcoming things? Is it a bad idea to be a bit intense with a person which I had a lot of intense talks? I want to tell her my true intentions, that I do want her back, but that I'm willing to wait and for her to see that I have changed...I guess my question is, it is ok to voice the real itnentions in this manner? To even say, look in this time alone I did realize I do trully love you, and that it is not coming from a place of fear?
By the way, the best results I've seen for people with abusive anger is with the energy therapy techniques of Bradley Nelson, which Dale Petterson in my office does for my clients. It's quite amazing how these techniques seem to pull the anger out by the roots....though multiple interventions plus conventional couple and individual treatment have to be part of the treatment strategy.
If you want this guy to be your boyfriend, you have to make him think that being in a relationship was all his idea. So remove all the pressure and stop stressing him out with your constant talks about being committed to each other. Soon enough, being with you will be the only thing on his mind, and he won’t even hesitant letting you know that he’s ready for a relationship.

Im not gonna brag but my momma gave birth to a beauty and I can’t hide it on my worst day. I’m intelligent, sweet and spicy saucy, intuitive. I work out and have a very nice natural body and no im not in my 20’s or 30’s either. everywhere i go almost everyday i get noticed by men and women alike. ive come to the conclusion that some of these me DO NOT BELIEVE THEY DESERVE A FINE ASS WOMAN such as myself. I know this because, with a couple of them they went for the woman who had less requirements and lower standards. they were I won’t say ugly, but i mean if we’re being honest, they were not a woman I could have been compared to. i hate saying this because beauty is in the eye of the beholder and we are born with what we have. i don’t say what i said to sound rude, but all women don’t look the same just like all men are not 220 with perfect abs full head of hair and perfect teeth and gorgeous blue eyes etc. plus one of them even told me he couldn’t give me what i was looking for. and he was probably right after hindsight. i do want a man who can afford a car, and i do want a man who is willing to call me and not use texting as much. i do want a man who isn’t hung up on his druggie ex girlfriend and I do want a man who can get his own place to live. yeah now that i think about it he was right.
My man is going through a withdrawal period now, and I won’t lie, it’s tough. But anyway the fact is that when he withdraws, as a woman you feel like he doesn’t care anymore, he’s pulling a slow fade, he’s toying with me. This may be true, especially if he’s generally uncaring, treata you like crap, i.e. if there was never that connection between the two of you. However if the man has never given you a reason to not trust him, then maybe you must acknowledge that yours fears are just fears – not based on any factual evidence.

I didn’t realize it then, but I don’t think I should’ve jumped back into the relationship so quickly. Because very soon afterwards, I started to fall into another slump after I lost two jobs within two months. I was stressed again, and started to feel depressed without realizing how much I put on his shoulders. He never complained. He was there for me. I feel like I took it for granted a little bit.
I broke up with my ex about six months ago after a five month relationship. it was very intense and he was completely in love with me. However i wasn’t ready for such a serious relationship so I broke up with him. i tried to be friends with him but he started acting a little needy so i cut off contact with him. over the past few months i’ve realized that i am ready for a relationship with him because i really did love him and he never did anything to hurt me i just wasn’t ready at the time. I texted him the other day asking to be friends and later that day, my friend told me he was seeing someone. I want to respect the relationship but also want him to know that i am willing to wait for him and in the meantime i’ll do things that make me happy. Is this a good idea? I feel like she is a rebound. he told me i was the love of his life and that he never felt a connection with anyone else like he did with me so i find it hard to believe that he is serious about the girl he started dating shortly after our breakup. Nonetheless if he is i will back off but i also feel like what we had isn’t over yet.
A week or so ago my boyfriend of one year broke up with me, said his feelings just went away, and that he had been feeling that may for a while. We were perfect together, had the same sense of humour, always had a great time together no matter what we were doing, could easily and effectively communicate, etc. We were absolutely infatuated with each other! but there was one issue that came up a few times that we could not seem to fix. This issue was that as much as I understood and agreed that time with friends is so important in any relationship, i justwanted to be more involved in his life sometimes in regards to hanging out with him and his friends, and him hanging out with me and mine and not have him always going out late without including me, every single time. However for some reason he just did not want me to join them, and never wanted to come meet me when I was with my friends, even if they had their partners with them. After yet another discussion about this issue, he just decided he couldn’t compromise and broke up with me instead. Also said that he’s lost feelings for me. I trust completely that there was no cheating involved. I am wondering whether I have a good chance of getting him back in terms of him realising what he had through no contact, because honestly, apart from that we were absolutely perfect together, and I wonder if the same issue coming up a few times is what turned him off, even though I was never suggesting that he stop go out at all.
Lynn is passionate about healthy relationships.  Trained by the Relationship Coaching Institute, her mission is to help singles date more effectively and find the love of their life. She also works with couples to hone their awareness and skills so they can have the happy, healthy and lasting relationship they dream of.  Her website is www.lovecoachlynn.com.
Since men are by nature visual creatures who tend to be drawn to a woman based soley on the physical attraction and the chemistry he feels with her, many men tend to make poor, long-term dating choices. This type of attraction is understandable and should not be ignored when choosing a partner, but what most men fail to do is combine these biological feelings with what they require in a relationship to make them truly happy.
Getting a guy to commit isn’t that hard at all. You just need to know what you want and be bold enough to go after it. Some studies say that the word ’want’ is one of the most powerful words on the planet. And if you have been wondering what makes a man commit, then wonder no more.; just find little ways to make him 'want' you. Turn this demanding word into something sexy and use it to your advantage. Tell him what you want and when you want it. But don’t make it sound like you are a spoiled brat or like you are being bossy. Just make sure you give out the vibe of a confident woman whose views and wishes can’t be shaken just because you’re in love. Men like to rule but they love a woman who knows when to take control; he will love that, for sure.
I met in 2007 in the United States, I’m in Canada we met at a concert and for me, as soon as I saw him I knew I loved him. We hit it off and within a few weeks I was going to the states to visit him, we started dating and I was so happy, but because of the distance and him not being able to cross the boarder to come up and see me( he tried once) due to felonies in the states, I wasn’t able to go every weekend. He started to go down a bad path and got into drugs, I was always there for him even tho I didn’t know the extent of what he was doing. I told him I loved him, and he freaked out, we drifted apart and I was hurt.
In an effort to resuscitate an already dysfunctional relationship, women will frequently make the fatal error of bluffing. Your girlfriend will repeatedly threaten to break up with you in order to scare you into changing (for the record I wholeheartedly disagree with this method, but that discussion is for another article), hoping you will prove your love by doing anything to make her happy. It never works, and you rarely take her threats seriously. So you break up.
Long distance relationship, We dead-loved each other for one year and then I broke up. She left immediately and I missed her for two weeks and texted back. Three months I didnt care, She kept texting and called. slowly she came up with this breakup thing. All of a sudden she declared breakup and I couldnt digest it. I begged her for 2 weeks. Will she get back? How long should I wait?

If you had genuinely meant something to him, even her consolation would not be enough to fill the void that was lost between you and him. This is something only time will tell, and you made the right decision as it wasn't fair to you that he was going about confused and having the best of both worlds, hurting and confusing you in the process. It'll definitely work out happily for you, whether you end up with him or not, because you made the decision not to cling onto something toxic, and while it may hurt now, in the long run, you'll be happy to know that you made the right decision to free yourself from it.
If you want this guy to be your boyfriend, you have to make him think that being in a relationship was all his idea. So remove all the pressure and stop stressing him out with your constant talks about being committed to each other. Soon enough, being with you will be the only thing on his mind, and he won’t even hesitant letting you know that he’s ready for a relationship.
Regardless of who makes more, it’s important to value each other’s contributions to the relationship. This includes agreeing on how bills will be shared, how saving responsibilities will be allocated, and so on. In instances where there’s a significant difference in earnings between your income and that of your partner, it’s essential to ensure that they identify a purpose to their support e.g., he or she might accept responsibility for funding college savings, or family vacations.
Getting a guy to commit isn’t that hard at all. You just need to know what you want and be bold enough to go after it. Some studies say that the word ’want’ is one of the most powerful words on the planet. And if you have been wondering what makes a man commit, then wonder no more.; just find little ways to make him 'want' you. Turn this demanding word into something sexy and use it to your advantage. Tell him what you want and when you want it. But don’t make it sound like you are a spoiled brat or like you are being bossy. Just make sure you give out the vibe of a confident woman whose views and wishes can’t be shaken just because you’re in love. Men like to rule but they love a woman who knows when to take control; he will love that, for sure.
Together for a year. Broke up back in January after a bad fight, and a string of tough times due to bad communication. I was sure that it wasn’t meant to be, supported her through the heartbreak, continued daily contact, lunch dates, sex, but no sleepovers. After two months of this she decided she needed to move on. I was bummed but thought I knew what I was doing. She started going on a few dates and instantly linked up with a new guy (hoping a rebound). She even posted videos on Snapchat wearing a turned in claddagh ring after a month (very unlike her). A month after we cut ties, I realized I screwed up. I missed her so much, reflected for two weeks, came to a lot of conclusions about things I wasn’t giving to the relationship, etc. I then Stupidly went into desperation mode. For a week I bombarded her with pleads of my love. What I learned and how it will be different etc. She was not receptive. Said it’s time for me to move on, stop reaching out to her friends for advice, we’re not getting back together she’s happy and in a good place right now. I stupidly have already looked for very needy and realized I should’ve went no contact.
So stop over-explaining every little thing, stop sharing all of your childhood stories with him, and don’t let him know what you’re doing at all hours of the day. Keep some things to yourself, and it will make him even more curious about who you really are. He will subconsciously know that in order to peel back all of your layers, he needs to take the next step and ask you for exclusivity.
You may worry about the old adage, “Out of sight, out of mind,” and use that as a justification to reach out. The thought of him moving on and forgetting about you is too terrifying to bear. One little text won’t hurt, you reason. But, in this instance, it will hurt. If you want your ex back, it is important that you strictly adhere to the no contact rule.
Sometimes you can use social media to your advantage. One of the best ways to make a man miss you is by being independent. Let Mr. Right see this new, independent you via social media. Are you taking a cooking class or finally checking skydiving off your bucket list? Make sure you share it with your friends and that special someone. Do not fabricate elaborate, fake posts. Be you, be fun, and be authentic. He will want to be by your side for every new adventure. Guys want to make sure you have a life outside of him and what better way to show him this than by sharing your adventures with him, indirectly. If you’re on your phone constantly sending him images of all the fun you’re having it’s not going to be at all effective. Usually, when you’re having fun with your friends sending the guy in your life images isn’t something that should interest you because you’re busy doing you. So use your social media to update everyone of the fun you’re having and this will drive him crazy.
Why is it that when a girl and a guy break up, the girl spends weeks missing him, but he seems to move on within a millisecond? It isn’t fair. It isn’t right. Why should he get to walk away and instantly start to rebuild his life, when you’re stuck at home wishing that he’d call? He shouldn’t. You need to do something about it. You need to make him miss you, just as much as you’re missing him, but how can you do that? How can you make a guy miss you, when it was him who broke up with you in the first place?
Once you're in the bedroom (and aware of his insecurities), remind him of how much you enjoy being intimate. For example, if he's worried about his weight, maybe give him a sexy once-over and tell him how how buff he looks naked. Other key areas to compliment: His gut, as men often worry about the size of it (and other measurable parts), and their hair, as guys tend to feel self-conscious once they start losing it.
Well she called me Sunday and I was asking her what was wrong. She said she didn't know, she just didn't feel like herself and that she felt weird. She was acting kind of weird like she wanted to tell me something but was playing dumb. So we stay on the phone for the rest of the night just talking about whatever. We laughed n shit. It was good. Then she told me that she wanted to play Fortnite Saturday night but didnt wanna bother me. I said I did too but I didn't because of the night before. I told her I was surprised that she called me to talk. She asked "you didnt want me to?" and I said "no of course but again, friday". She said "yeah I know". I told her why I didnt talk to her Saturday so I could have a clear mind about things and what happened. Told her I missed her and we got into talking about getting back together. She was taking it really well and listening. Not much conversation. She said she was gonna get a shower and that shed call me when she got out. So she calls me back and I was gonna forget the conversation but she said "you had something you wanted to talk about?" and I thought she wanted to talk about it too so I brought it up again and she just said "well I already told you how I felt on Friday". I said "yeah I know" and changed the subject and we fell asleep on the phone. She also facetimed me for a lil while like we used to.
Women love being surprised. When a man goes out of his way to surprise his partner, he sends a message:  I care about you. You are important to me so I want to think of ways to make you happy.  You are worth the effort.  He gives his significant other a reason to look at him with admiration and he enables her to brag to her girlfriends about how lucky she is to have such an amazing and thoughtful guy (and if she is active on social media, no doubt there will be some accolades there as well!).
#7 He has low self-esteem. If you’ve been together for a while and things have not gone financially the way that he thought they would, he may be feeling inadequate. When a man feels like he can’t provide the way that he wants to, the pressure of being with someone he loves can become overwhelming. Transferring his feelings of inadequacy to you, he may unwittingly be pulling away due to his own feelings of inadequacy, blaming you for his failures.
Hi Lauren, I've been wrestling with this with family and friends and thought maybe someone else online could help.Here's my situation. I have known my fiance for over a year, we met online and have visited each other many times. I've flown over to ireland three to four times for weeks at a time and she had visited the US for six weeks to try it out in february and for the fiance visa for six weeks in July-Sept. We would talk everyday for four to five hours a night while we were apart. She is very close to her family and loves her country. She believes Ireland is the best thing since refried beans. My plan was for her to Move to the US and we could live there while she could visit ireland for two to three months every year with the future kids for summer and christmas and then we'd move to ireland for good when I retired since I'm the bread winner and my specified job is in america (I'm a petroleum Engineer). However she back peddled and said she doesn't think what we had is strong enough to leave her family. So she came up with a five year plan. When she moved to the US for five years then we have to move back to ireland and find work there. I really loved her to i agreed to the promise. Well while she was over in the US for the fiance visa she started getting really homesick. A week or so before the wedding she said she realized why she had doubts about the marriage and that was that she loved me but wasn't "in love with me" and that I should treat her more like a lover instead of a friend. But to not worry about it and we can work on it. The next night she popped the question. "If i wanted to go back to ireland in a year will you go with me?" I said no. "what about after five years to raise our kids?" I sighed and just said no. She called off the wedding and cried alot. I should have said something other than no. Like, yes that's our plan. Or we'll do what's best for our fam...
Are you waiting anxiously for his call? Are you eager to meet him? Even if you are, you should not always be available to them whenever they want to see you. If you want to want to create a relationship that is worth investing into and if you want to make him realize your value, then you should create some mystery. If you are always available then he will not feel it necessary to try hard.
I’d also love your opinion,I was with someone for a few months and I really feel there was a good connection I felt something special. We met in the city I go to university at but he lives in another city. We texted and got on well there and then we met and things were just as good in person and it began from there. He’s been having a bad time in a lot of ways with family problems work etc and has been very down for months and pulled away a bit and I think because I found the distance hard and not really knowing what was going on I reacted badly and also had some problems of my own so was in a stressed frame of mind,I became needy and angry and upset with him and pushed him away more. In my opinion we weren’t seeing each other enough but I wish I’d been a bit more patient and just seen where things had gone.He’s said he only likes me so I know it’s wasnt that he didn’t have feelings but I pushed and pushed and ruined things. We’ve both said we need space but it ended in an argument.
Thank u so much your email and articles I have been reading are great.! That are helping me realize that the relationship I’m in is not healthy. I meet this guy from a really good friend of mine.! He is a retired marine he is very different from the guys I’ve dated. Which is very different me, my parents like him a lot. But we argue alott. He says I have no discipline in my life he blames me for all the arguments we have, and its always my fault. I feel happy at moments but it seems I have to be very careful of what I say and do or how I act when I’m with him. He has left the house like 6 times.He says he really loves me but I don’t think he does. Or maybe I’m just trying to hard for this relationship to work which is not going to go anywere! Any advice will be greatly appreciated thank u very much.:)
Then I tried to write him and tell him we need to get back together. But it was too late. I met him and he said he was sitting with a girl friend which he didnt talk to since our last breakup. He said our relationship was a total disaster, that it cant work. That he tried everything he could and swore that if the last time we cant make it go so thats it. He told me hes not going to come back with me and he is really happy by himself. Then he said that he doesnt love me, that he thought he did but he was wrong. Hes not even going to come to Ozzy Osborne concert with me and didnt want to give me my ticket.
It’s finally happening: you met a man you’re compatible with, you really like him, and the feeling is mutual. He’s showering you with attention, making plans to see you, making time to call you, and generally letting you know that he’s so happy to have found you. How does a man act when he’s falling in love? Just like this—and you’ve never been happier, or more thankful, to have him by your side.
I was wondering. I have a friend that says he don’t ever want to be an a relationship ever again because of the pain that he has experienced in the past from passed relationships but yet he wants me to open up to him which I did and he wants me to continue to open up to him. Why would a man want you to open up to them if they don’t plan on having a future with you.

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