Sometimes the relationship started out well and then over time disintegrated into something that resembles resentment and abuse rather than love or respect.  Sometimes the relationship was never good to begin with, but the woman wants me to show her “relationship magic” to “make it work.”  This is what I equate to trying to shove a square peg into a round hole. (If this situation sounds familiar to you, be sure to read this article on Signs You’re in a Toxic Relationship.)

if you only tell him you miss him, that will not complicate things at all. in a relationship, you gotta be open and transparent. if you love him, tell him. if you miss him, tell him. don’t wait for him to say it first just because you’re too afraid he won’t say it back. you are telling him because you feel that way and not because you want to feel good about yourself.


Hi, He sounds as if he has a lot of his own insecurities and is deflecting them onto you. He is constantly trying to change you, and tell you that you aren’t enough. You sound to me as if you are not comfortable in being yourself around him. You can’t petend to be someone else to please jom forever, so picture this you are trying to adapt yourself to who he wanrlts and he is still finding flaws. Aren’t you tired already,? he is damaging your self-esteem. There is someone out there , who you may or may not have met, that will adore you flaws and all, bit you have to love yourself enough to know when you are being tolerated , and ” handled”, not loved. This guy you are with, needs you a lot more than you need him, be careful not to allow him to force you to change into someone nobody wants, so thy he can keep you all to himself, while he used you. By that, I mean an insecure, unhappy person that doesn’t feel worthy of anything.
Make a major independent financial decision. Talk about buying a car, a plot of land, a house, or maybe a Cessna. The reason: You're making him aware that you don't need him to move your life forward. And if he asks you why you didn't consult him first about the decision, jokingly say, "It's not like we're married!" He'll have to respond with a request for clarification of exactly what he is to you, if he's going to have any say in your financial matters. That sounds like the start of The Talk.
My ex girlfriend and I broke up about 6 weeks ago. From there all I had done was being needy and desperate. She would block me and unblock me and all I did was just like a fool was just beg and plead. Honestly I've understood the reason of the break up and I've accepted it and I understand how much I messed up... especially since I was sending her a message that I couldn't change. If you must know I am very confident and I know I can get her back if I do things correctly. We haven't talked in 2 weeks. and since then I've been working on myself and taking my time to understand my mistakes so i could learn from them. I know that she blocked me because i pressured her in such a bad way that led her to that choice and I know understand all my mistakes. I'm a very confident guy know but my question is how should I approach her. I really cannot connect her because she fully blocked me and i don't know if she wants to talk to me because i don't know wether she wants that or not. Now for the past few days she's been looking kind of sad since we haven't talked and she's been kind of starring at me and she also started to follow me ( trying to get my attention in a way) but also she's been trying to act like if she's the one in control and she doesn't really get affected so that kind of leads me to ask you guys What should I do at this point and also why is she trying to get my attention if she acts all so tough like if she's holding all the cards?
I didn’t realize it then, but I don’t think I should’ve jumped back into the relationship so quickly. Because very soon afterwards, I started to fall into another slump after I lost two jobs within two months. I was stressed again, and started to feel depressed without realizing how much I put on his shoulders. He never complained. He was there for me. I feel like I took it for granted a little bit.
Wow that was a lot huh? I mean, we haven’t even started contacting our exes yet have we? Well, right now is when we begin that step. Are you excited? Alright, there is a lot of debate about this step. Every expert (myself included) seems to have a different opinion on the method you should use for contacting an ex. Some recommend writing a get your boyfriend back letter, some say you should give them a call and some even say you should text. So, what is the best method?
I have been seeing a guy for just about a year. His job is giving him a lot of stress and he became much more distant. For a whole year, he never missed a good morning or night text. We never texted all day long as we are both busy but that one morning text we sent each other was just enough to let us both know we were thinking of one another. His stopped pretty abruptly. My initial reaction was to panic and I did in a way but didn’t let him see that. Last weekend he apologized for not texting me so much but to trust that he still loves me. I was a bit stumped because I never once verbalized anything about the non texting issue, so I wondered why he would say that. I asked him if he would prefer me not text him at all during the week ( which I never did anyway, only one morning text and maybe a “have a good afternoon”) and he said yes, unless it was important.

My girlfriend of 2 years broke up with me in August, reason being she felt I don’t need her. I basically did all the things deadly mistake you mentioned above before i found this website. Affection, angry, begging, name calling etc you named it, I already done that. I realized my mistakes now. she recently blocked me from message and call her, whatsspp etc. she said she doesn’t want me anymore and move on. what should i do to win her back?


Now, what’s happening in your body when you picture a man pulling away and going further off into the distance? Can you FEEL your body wanting to lean forward and doing anything you can to stop him from going away? This “leaning forward” urgency is what causes a man to feel pressured and cornered. That’s why you need to STOP it by doing the opposite: leaning BACK.
But not for the reason you think! Studies have shown that boys are more affectionate, even more expressive, than girls until they reach school age. At that time, social repression begins — of words, thoughts, feelings — and the desire for human connection goes underground. So taboo is this desire for intimacy that its possibility can terrify men; not because it's smothering, but because they realize how desperate they are for it.

Remember that communication is key to building healthy relationships, so ensure you figure out what each other wants before taking things further. This isn’t to say that you should turn up in a white dress, as if you’re auditioning for Frozen: The Musical (you know it’s happening), on the first date. However, as you’re getting to know someone and during the course of your relationship, you need to ask questions pertaining to your future and whether you want the same things in life?


my guy also told me we shall be good friends and after that he started to ‘bench’me..i caught him online 24/7 on all the social media channels,you see: somebody who changes a relationship into a friendship is suspicious enough and under the pretense of a ‘friendship’ he wants to end the whole thing, at least your guy is not responding to your messages at all, because my guy did respond every once in a while and every time we wanted to meet up he was ‘sick’ until i ended the whole thing
None of this is to excuse men pulling away, and this covers only some men. But it does explain why many, many men feel more comfortable with their “hanging buddies” — who are in all the same predicaments they are — more than they feel comfortable with they women in their lives. I think many men both desire and feel profoundly uncomfortable with women, and terrified of being judged. Because they’ve already judged themselves.
Have you ever found yourself dating a guy who seems perfect in the beginning, only to find out later that he was a bad choice? Are you having a difficult time finding love? The possibilities are you are taking the wrong steps and are in need of relationship advice for women. You might want to have a romantic relationship with the most perfect person. It is never too late to change the romance stars and bring back love and happiness into your life.
My gf of about 3 years and I have broken up "for good" as of 2-3 weeks ago. We've been off and on for those 3 years, mostly due to (unintended) pressure on my part to advance the relationship. We never officially dated, or really called each other gf/bf, despite what I had felt — which shouldn't be a big deal, but didn't help things either. Those things aside, we were best friends, relying on each other for feedback on our work, talked about and were involved with each other's lives, both of us approaching our mid 30s. We found ourselves in a cycle of being together, since being with a friend is easy, then everything coming to a head, breaking up for a time, and drifting back into each other. But we always made each other laugh, we bonded over big and small things, and ... this break has been very difficult for me. We'd said I love you several times. We were highly compatible sexually. But when it came time to talk about the future, she'd put up walls, if she even talked at all. It was strained. She has issues with her parents' divorce when she was young, and her father was manipulative and untrustworthy. I have my own issues with parents who weren't in love, so there was some common ground in some way. I said I understood where she was coming from and suggested going to therapy together toward the end, but it didn't hold.
Many articles also suggest playing mind games and using pride/ego to win the person back, but honestly, these are all extremely unhealthy habits and qualities that should be avoided when going into a relationship. It's true that since he broke up with you, and it may seem weak to be the one to reach out, but by waiting, you could honestly end up doing so indefinitely. Think about what you want at the end of the day, and I always believe that we should fight for what we want. If you genuinely want him back, it would be best to put pride and ego aside, doesn't matter who broke up with who, and just sincerely fight for him (not in a desperate and overbearing way of course) following our guidelines to reach out.
If you want your man to love you more, you should make a point of showing him daily with random acts of kindness, just make sure they are specific. So if he loves grilled cheese sandwiches, make sure you cook that up for lunch. Perhaps he’s a movie buff so grab him a few passes to the theater. If he always has dry lips, make sure he’s got Chapstick in his pockets when he needs it. And if he loves to have the boys over for hockey, you should make plans on the hockey nights and let him know he should invite them over to hang out.
He may need a little time to adjust to the situation you two are in, if it’s a long-distance thing, then he’s going to need space and time to think about everything. This doesn’t mean start ignoring his calls or stop texting him back, you should simply realize he may need space. Just because he wants some space also doesn’t mean he doesn’t miss you, sometimes change is a huge thing and people deal with it in different ways. Giving him space will allow him to realize how much he loves and misses you, this is likely to lead to a discussion between the two of you about your feelings.
Understand the breakup. What did each of you do to contribute to the breakup? Most relationship troubles do not crop up unexpectedly, but build up over time. The odds are good that it wasn't a one-sided problem and that there were signs that it was coming. Take some time and do some soul searching before you attempt to get your ex back. You want to make sure you are not wasting your time or energy on something futile.
Most girls are attracted to the alpha male for deep biological reasons: They believe he can provide for them better, protect them better, and give her biologically fit children. Even if you don't think that alpha males are your ex's type, subtle changes might work on her: pump out your chest a bit, make an effort to work out your arms and thighs, and project strength.
Amy Schoen specializes in helping marriage-minded people create lifelong relationships and build the family lives they desire. As a Certified Professional Life Coach, Amy combines her life coaching, incredible life experience, and gift for visualization to help clients connect with the Right One to find committed relationships that align with their values, goals, and desire for family. Check out her site motivatedtomarry.com.

Hey I am currently dealing with this with my boyfriend I just came across these tips I don’t think its too late to try. My boyfriend and I have been together for 7 years and we have conceived two children within our relationship a 4year old girl and 2year old boy. Lately my boyfriend has been under tremendous stress and I haven’t acknowledged that so I was adding on to his stress by arguing and nagging I ended up pushing him away now and I think for good this morning before he left he said hes done for good because I kept forcing to fix the problem. I’m struggling on giving him his space because we live together in a studio its hard to walk past him everyday and just not talk to him. How do I give him his space and just have distance I am a stay at home mom so I don’t work and I don’t leave the house I’m home with my kids. Any tips on how to enforce the space so he can clear hos mind I know he loves me dearly hes just very stressed out and wants to clear his mind on his own he said so himself.
So many red flags! He seems abusive. For starters, he shouldn’t be calling you names and putting you down. And the fact that he dislikes your being independent and ought to be cleaning or cooking for him is so sexist, I can’t even… All this leads me to believe he will be physically and more emotionally abusive as time goes by. Run as far away as possible. I know it’s hard, but I don’t see your situation getting better. Stay safe.
My point is, this isn’t a trick you pull to “get” someone to commit and then stop. Because the day you stop is the day you give up. It’s the way you live your life together — can you think of a better way than to continue to impress and engage and deserve each other? I can’t. The key is to practice that NOW, not so you can stop doing it when you find someone, but so you can really start.
Make a major independent financial decision. Talk about buying a car, a plot of land, a house, or maybe a Cessna. The reason: You're making him aware that you don't need him to move your life forward. And if he asks you why you didn't consult him first about the decision, jokingly say, "It's not like we're married!" He'll have to respond with a request for clarification of exactly what he is to you, if he's going to have any say in your financial matters. That sounds like the start of The Talk.
Forgot to add, we plan to see each other before the year ends. So around November, Part of me is like ok, dont talk until End of September and ease back in Oct/Nov until you guys see each other again. What this article said about friends and family is so true! I have nothing negative to say about my bf. They feel just because he broke up with me that he is supposed to me the enemy. "Forget him!" "Men are stupid" "Thats his loss, he couldnt man up!" "You deserve better" I hold no hate, only hurt & I accept my part in our demise. It literally made everything worse because i do not feel that way.
My ex girlfriend and I broke up about 6 weeks ago. From there all I had done was being needy and desperate. She would block me and unblock me and all I did was just like a fool was just beg and plead. Honestly I've understood the reason of the break up and I've accepted it and I understand how much I messed up... especially since I was sending her a message that I couldn't change. If you must know I am very confident and I know I can get her back if I do things correctly. We haven't talked in 2 weeks. and since then I've been working on myself and taking my time to understand my mistakes so i could learn from them. I know that she blocked me because i pressured her in such a bad way that led her to that choice and I know understand all my mistakes. I'm a very confident guy know but my question is how should I approach her. I really cannot connect her because she fully blocked me and i don't know if she wants to talk to me because i don't know wether she wants that or not. Now for the past few days she's been looking kind of sad since we haven't talked and she's been kind of starring at me and she also started to follow me ( trying to get my attention in a way) but also she's been trying to act like if she's the one in control and she doesn't really get affected so that kind of leads me to ask you guys What should I do at this point and also why is she trying to get my attention if she acts all so tough like if she's holding all the cards?
Let’s say one night you decide to watch home movies from an old-fashion projector. You put in a video of you at 5 years old playing at your first recital. You curl up on the couch with popcorn and hot chocolate (two of your favorite things) and begin to watch. Unfortunately, there appears to be a weird blemish in the video, so you decide to change it and put on a video of your 10th birthday party but somehow the blemish is in that video too. So, you run over to the wall, wipe the screen, and put in one more video… yet again, the spot is still showing up.
Stop being jealous. Being jealous will get you nowhere. Jealousy is associated with fear and anxiety, two unattractive traits to have. Plus, what you're non-verbally telling her is that you want to control her. No one wants to be controlled. So learn to fight your jealousy if you can, and focus on being non-threatening. You'll get more bees with honey than you will with vinegar.

Hello Adam. Thanks for offering such an exciting post and video. You’ve HIT the nail on the head! From my experience, yes, men totally enjoy their SPACE and we should make sure they get it. Respect his space and have him respect yours. Confident women with a touch of mystery and charm will most likely excite men to pursue and return again and again. I enjoy spontaneity and time spent exclusively enjoying my own range of soothing pleasures. First enjoy loving yourself – having a massage, facial, pedicure, and or just spending time at favorite events with other special friends and family. SPACE can make the relationship exciting!
Be someone that he’ll miss. Are you being your awesome, fun self when you do get to speak to him or spend time with him? Do you keep cool, calm, and collected? Do you have a laugh with him? Do you compliment him? Guys are pretty simple beings. They want to see and speak to people who make them feel good. If you’re a positive person to be around, there’s no denying that he’ll want to hang out with you more and more.
Pursue your passion. Most of us may struggle to say what our passion in life is. We are too bogged down in our obligations, responsibilities, and routines to carve out any time to give some thought to the things we are passionate about. Your time of no contact is as good a time as any to figure it out. Maybe you’ve always had a love for good art. Maybe you are excited by gardening or writing. Take this time to do those things Also, take this time to try something new. You might just find a passion for something you didn’t know you had before. Engaging in the activities and hobbies that we love, that we are good at, and that we are passionate about go a long way to remind us of our essence and make us feel alive again.
After a few months, the calls and texts slowed down, I was still visiting, but not sure where I stood with him,I would text, and his responses weren’t the same as before, I started to think he wasn’t interested anymore, he would sometimes bring up the fact that he is not able to like or love someone on the emotional level, I felt like he was backing off. I just got back 2 days ago and while I was there I asked him if he liked me or had feelings for me, he looked sad but said no he doesn’t have feelings for me and he can’t like anyone because he doesn’t like himself. He would say “just keep being my friend”. I am heart broken over it….
Wallah awesome advices I’ve been with my guy more than a year now even f we r in different culture he always telling me it doesn’t matter and when I answered ur quizzes it just like a test paper also been told by my guy for me ur ryt it’s about inner self must know not just bcz d eyes want to see…and I’m satisfied and happy with my friends guy bcz he is God fearing and teach me lot more of faith values which really was a different from my culture..ALLAH bless U Eric may U continue help people who r in need of advices regarding love and the likes….
I met my BF six months ago. I thought things were going great. If he needs me to do things for him I do if I can. Usually because of our work schedules we only see each other on the weekends so I am not crowding him. We have never had a bad argument although he has made me mad before I get over things quickly. Then out of the blue he stopped calling and returning my calls. Was he hurt or dead? I drove to his house and knocked. No answer although his truck was there. I left a note but haven’t heard back. It’s been two weeks. I’m very hurt and confused. I feel like I could be okay with giving him space if he had said he needed space. At least then I wouldn’t have to speculate. I had told him I loved him and maybe he freaked out. But I believe if you feel it. Should say it because tomorrow is not promised and I don’t want to regret not saying it. FYI my BF is twice divorced. Maybe that’s why he’s freaked.
Though it can be difficult to ask a man what he is looking for, it also challenges you to get one step closer to your goal. The more comfortable you are with this the easier it will become. I know that some people may not always take my advice to challenge themselves and ask the man what he is looking for, so I want to give you some other clues on what to pay attention to if you don’t want to have this conversation with him. Side note, I am in no way I offering you a pass to wiggle out of the conversation! Remember, challenge yourself.
Update: I had a legal question so I texted him after about 6 weeks from when he asked for space, and he responded quite eagerly, and told me he would normally not give legal advice to someone he found so sexy and with whom he has intimate relations… he told me I owed him dinner but I just laughed and thanked him for the legal advice. Now it’s his time to wait!! I texted him again a few days ago with another legal question, and he called me today on the phone because he said that he could only answer the question off record and not in writing. He told him that normally he would not give out free legal advice, but he liked me and wanted to help. I thanked him and he said he wanted us to talk again soon… Slow moving but promising! :)
Hi, Me and Ex girlfriend dated for 2 and a half years. We started dating when i was 16 in high school. Now i am 18 and attending college as a freshman. We were best friends for 3 years prior to dating. About 4 months prior to the break up, i started to not keep my promises and not treat her right. 3 weeks prior to the break up i started catching old feelings for a girl i had liked before. i decided to break up with her but still have the intention of getting back together while i was flirting with the other girl. As soon as i figured out the old girl i caught feelings for liked me as well, i ended things completely with my long term girlfriend. this broke her and she started to talk to another guy i knew wasn't right for her and a guy she said she would avoid and never date. I realized after about 2 weeks after the break up i made a terrible mistake and just wanted to be with my long term girlfriend. As of yesterday, i texted and called her so many times. But as of today, i havent talked to her. I really want her back and in the stage of cutting off contact with her at the moment. She said she has completely moved on and doesn't see a future with us and doesn't want to speak and or see me as of yesterday. what do you guys think i should do? thanks guys and i know i was a jerk.
Getting a man to miss you can be tiring, so make sure you have the patience for it. Also, remember, men love to chase you, so give him something to work for. And if that's not enough to get a guy to miss you, we recommend you read James Bauer's Respect Principle, his best-selling relationship guide basically hypnotizes men to fall and stay in love with you with 1, dead-simple tip.
One of the most devastating mistakes you can make is trying to force it to work with a guy who is wrong with you. I’ve seen people spend years of their life trying to shove a square peg into a round hole. Everyone in their life tells them to just move on and let him go but they can’t. Why? Because they don’t have clarity or any objectivity because they are still sucked into the emotional whirlpool and have yet to break themselves free. <<<<
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