Reason #3. You may still be in shock and denial about your past relationship but once you clear your head, you can probably list a good number of really bad things that happened in your relationship, ranging from arguments to the silent treatment or worse. When we are broken up with, we tend to focus on the breezy early good memories from when we were head-over-heals in love. But that is unlikely to be the state of your relationship towards the end of it. Do you really want your relationship back as it was toward the end of it? Probably not. You want the beginning. But the thing is, the beginning cannot reoccur. It only occurs when your hormones and neurotransmitters are completely out of wrack, and you are crazy madly in love, because everything is new. Things cannot be new now, not now. Maybe in six months or two years, but not now.
i admit, being in a relationship feels like riding a roller coaster. when it is going up you feel very excited but when it goes down, that is when you are feeling unwell. i want to make sure that my boyfriend would still miss me even if we spend a lot of times together. we’ve been together for almost 5 years now and i want the spark to always be there. will make this article my source.
I want to start off by saying thank you for adding a guys input Eric! My question is how do know if your inspiring him to be his best self and inspire him in his lifes mission if you dont know what that is? The guy im kind of seeing has only initiated deep conversation once and it was to ask what i thought about us. Am i supposed to ask him out right or am i supposed to try and figure it out all on my own?
Don’t worry about him enjoying the free time with his friends. Of course, giving him space to enjoy is going to make you look confident and less clingy. He may seem to enjoy it, but eventually, your boyfriend will crave more time with you. So, the next time he tries to come up with excuses to hang out with his friends, let him go. If he wants to go on a boys’ trip, allow him. The more time he is away from you, the more he will realize what he’s missing. He might think his friends are important and deserves his time but he will soon learn that he can’t spend his lifetime with only them, he needs you.

To a degree I understand the the above. I now how I deserve to be treated, I now what my worth is and I’ve told my guy I deserve better if it makes him run for the hill so be it. It’s ok to retreat to man gave but get a little bit of communication in any relationship I called respect. Even if it’s I need time out. I’m sick off of hanging in the side line while he tries to figure wither I mean enough or not. I beleive I myself and respect myself enough to know when enough is enough. Xx
Ladies…all I can say is if you feel insecure about your looks then make yourself more attractive for YOU! Not for a man. There’s nothing that increases a woman’s feelings of insecurity more than doing something to herself FOR a man, or for the purpose of attracting men. It may make you feel confident and powerful in the short term, but that feeling doesn’t last if your focus is on doing it for him. Your purpose should be feeling better about yourself and increasing your own confidence regardless of men. What men seem to forget is that women are not on this earth solely for their pleasure. How you feel about yourself should be totally independent of what men think.
This is Dana I just want you to help with my issue. I met a guy I obsorved his character he is genuine, and kind to everyone. The thing is that he is making me to feel that he likes me but when I started to talk him as a friend, he just telling me tat he got crush on some one else & her age is 22 and few days after he Says tat he is loving a girl from the same premises and she is 24. I didn’t understand what he is trying to tell. My question for you is did he making to jealous or he just wants avoid me.
The way you communicate with her via text and in calls will need to change. Given that you’re in a breakup you’ve probably been doing it completely wrong, replying instantly to her messages even though she takes hours to get back to you. This has to stop, and you need to start communicating in a more attractive way, after the no contact period. That’s why I’m going to teach you how to get your ex-girlfriend back fast by text message, although be aware, texts are only part of it.
Try answering these questions: Do you miss your ex, or do you miss having a boyfriend or girlfriend? Did he or she make you feel better about yourself, more secure in the world, and happier? Do you imagine yourself with this person in the long-term, even when the excitement of being in love has worn off and you are stuck in the daily routines of life? If you are only missing the security of having someone and the excitement of a dramatic relationship, you can find those things with someone else in a healthier, more stable relationship.

I wouldn't recommend you get your hopes up simply based on this, as there's a chance that he just hadn't gotten around to it yet. Reading too much into the little things and getting your hopes up may result in your disappoint when it turns out to not be the case, and may even accelerate his actions (i.e getting rid of the things) if you bring it up.

Great article . Men deal with emotions differently , they also truly want to be in charge and for this they need to withdraw in order to think . For women its an opportunity to cool down and figure what they truly need from their men . And when he comes back be busy , be sweet ,understanding . Men dont change their mind that easily , the live they have for their women dont fade . Keep calm
So true! You can’t coerce someone to be with you. When a guy wants to be with you they just will. That is what happened with my current boyrfriend. We dated before and he didn’t want a commitment. We broke up and dated other people. We started talking again after many months of being apart, became friends for some time and began spending more time together. It naturally came together well and after time we verbally agreed that we were together and just wanted to be with each other. End of story. It’s very simple.

On the flip side, some men will pull away just as much if their date strongly insists that they must pay their own share. As callous as this may sound, most of us have egos bigger than Mt. Kilimanjaro, yet are as fragile as a fly. Trying to assert dominance in this situation may make your date run away. Even though you’ve done nothing wrong. Yes, I confess… we can be just as confusing to you, as women are to us.
Me and my ex boyfriend has been dating for 4 months when I got pregnant with his first child. I instantly didn’t want the baby because I was afraid or had fear that he would leave me like my first baby father. He has a hard time expressing himself and communicating so I didn’t know until now that I truly broke his heart when I aborted our baby! I want to make things better and get a second chance with being him but he says it broke him! Then he started talking with this other female of course me being jealous and her because he was barely their for me emotionally after the abortion I slapped and hit him a few times out of hurt/emotion of him moving on so fast ! I know to follow the guidelines but I’ve asked him multiple times what are we doing where are we going with this, and he says I’m being pushy and pressuring him to be back with me. And I do not want him to do that .. I want him to make his decision based off the love he had for me in the beginning but I also don’t want to come second to the female he is dealing with. How do I fall back and careless about us getting back together? Or should I just move on completely knowing that I broke his heart after aborting our baby? He said it was worse than someone cheating on him. I’m just so confused
The barriers facing women in the workforce continue to diminish, yet there are still double standards in many work settings. If you’re both a working professional and a mother, fulfilling your parenting duties and expectations can be a difficult balancing act to achieve. Ideally, the glass ceiling will fully shatter in our near future; but, until then, you need to protect yourself, your family, and your livelihood. This includes limiting how much your personal or family life intrudes upon your work (e.g., the amount of time you take off, or your communications with co-workers), and taking care of yourself to avoid burnout.
honestly I did not show appreciation to my ex while we together. I missed valentines day and his birthday. when I decided to make the best of times with him it was to late. then I asked him for closure and he came talked in person. I told what if I got therapy because there is something going on that effects my relationships. he told its been three weeks and I’m over you….. I cried of course then looked at him and said I feel better. just got sick of being sad, doesn’t mean I’m over him. but its step. then I told me what was really going on and told he’s proud of me said I’m strong person and good girl. he told me to feel free to talk to him and said he wont be jerk to me. he also wants to improve. it sucks that I was to occupied with other stuff in life that i didn’t learn to understand him but oh well. that doesn’t mean has feelings for me. sadly I cant live in world that revolves around him I must create my own world and keeping living up to my goals. this relationship may have been painful but helped realize what I need. we are blind from pain because only look at the bad qualities that it brings us but we all need realize its actually beautiful because it shapes us. I’m going to embrace it this break up..
Do something nice for her without expecting her to pay you back. If she's studying late for an exam, pop by with her favorite tea or coffee and let her know that you know she's going to kill it tomorrow. If one of her friends gets in an accident, stop by and pay your respects (the friend will definitely let your ex know you stopped by). If your ex mentions she wanted to see a movie, buy her two tickets for her and her friend to see, and don't butt in. Your time will come soon.
Have you ever dated a man where everything is going perfectly and you are bonding on every level, spending all your time together, and even making plans for the future, and then poof, he’s gone?!  Well believe it or not, this is a more common scenario that you might think.  Men feel pressure just like women do, and when it comes to relationships many men take flight, before they fight.  Take a look at these 8 reasons why he might be pulling away from you — to perhaps see if you can stop it.
Hey. I dated this guy for four years and I figured he was the love of my life. Over the last few months however we had been arguing a lot because of insecurities on my part. We had a serious argument that pushed him too far and he broke and told me that he couldn’t see himself going anywhere with me after it despite loving me and that I brought out the worst in him at that moment. I threw something belonging to him across the room in the argument and proceeded to ask him to leave. I’d been reminded of an earlier issue and just reacted without thought. It hurts a lot not only because Ive lost him but because I know I’m the reason. At first I was angry but asked him if there was anything I could do to fix my wrongs and if he was sure there was nothing left to fight for. He told me he’s serious about it and it’s not what he wants anymore, that I have issues with the way I want to handle things. He even brought up my abuse and told me he thinks I’m like that because I grew up in a violent home so argument is always my first approach. After rereading the messages I may have come off a little needy and desperate. I just figured fighting for the relationship and showing him how much I didn’t want to lose it was the best call but now after reading this article I’m not so sure. He told me he wanted to be friends and in the same breath even asked to come over by me to fix a problem on my phone he’s known about for a while but never got around doing for me. Is this fair? He dumps me but the day after wants to be over by me after seeing how much I asked him to stay. For this I told him that it was okay and that I’d get help elsewhere as I want to give him his space but “thank you anyway”. I want him back but I’ve recognised my faults and want to fix them first. With this scenario in mind do you think there is a chance for us ?
He Says He Misses Me: What Does It Mean When He Says He Misses You? The 10 Biggest Signs Your Ex Misses You How To Give Him Space So That He Misses You And Comes Back When Does A Man Miss A Woman? How To Make A Man Miss You (In 3 Steps) How to Give Someone Space Without Losing Them (Or Losing Your Mind) Exactly How To Make Your Ex Miss You After A Breakup
I have a question that I'm struggling to find the answer to. About 2 days into no contact my ex asked me to come by and pick up some of my stuff I left behind at her place. Around 5 days in she found someone had searched for porn websites in the browser search history on her PS3. She accused me and wanted an explanation, though I am certain it wasn't me. I don't watch porn, let alone on my gf's playstation. I didn't reply on both occasions, and haven't heard from her since. I'm coming up on 30 days soon, and I've drafted a couple elephant letters. So my question is: Do I address these false allegations in the letter? Or simply ignore them and address them only if they come up again in the future? I feel like both options have potential pros and cons, so I need a deciding factor. Thanks :)
Most of us know that men are visual: you are wired that way. My best relationship advice for you is not to be so distracted by looks that you ignore the “character” of your partner (or potential partner.) By character I mean whether the person is kind, considerate, compassionate and loving – and not just when he or she wants something! Is their communication gentle or harsh? How do they ask for what they want? Is it a request or is it a demand?
Be mysterious and surprising. If you are a complete open book when you first meet a guy, it won’t leave him with anything to be surprised by. Instead, you should tell an interesting fact about yourself each time you get together. This will leave your guy wanting to hear more about you, and waiting to find out what new thing he'll learn next. Be spontaneous with him. If you usually go to dinner for dates, invite him on an adventure like rock climbing one day. This spontaneity will excite him and keep him guessing at what you’ll want to do next.
I’ve been “hanging out” with this guy off and on for two years. Before meeting him I read books on this exact subject. I’ve been married and divorced twice so I wanted to make sure I knew what I was doing if I got involved with a man again. I’m very opened about my feels I always have been. I like that about myself but in the past I’ve also been pushy wanting things to happen right away. Now with this guy I’m “hanging out” with has pulled away a lot in the 2 yrs I’ve been seeing him, but he had always come back. I think it’s because I always gave him his space. Since being married and divorced twice taking things slow was fine with me. Just recently though, I couldn’t help myself and I told him that I loved him. I thought for sure he was going to pull away, but he didn’t not right away anyways. In fact, we talked about making it exclusive. I was so happy because it’s what I had been waiting patiently for two years for. Recently, we had a two year anniversary of when we met so being the person I am I gave him a card. I said a paragraph of very heartfelt things. I knew this would definitely make him pull away from me and I was right. Even though I know when it’s going to happen it still doesn’t make it easy to deal with. I love him and I want him to know this. I want him to know that I accept him for who he is. I feel the only way I’m going to get him to trust me is by letting him have his time away from me. When he comes back he’s different, for instance, he more loving sweeter. I believe him when he says he’s happy with me. He too has been in difficult relationships in the past that broke his heart. Love isn’t meant to go fast. Love takes time. I’m glad it’s going this way even though it’s hard because I came from abusive background and it’s why my marriages ended. This guy inspires me to grow and find myself. I’ve started back to school at 43 yrs old because of his encouragement. I don’t feel I have to be someone I’m not when I’m with him. I feel safe when I’m with him. I want him to feel the same when he’s with me. I feel that’s what true love is all about. I may love him but he’s not my whole world, he’s only part of it.
It can be tough to acknowledge that we messed up or that we could have done something better. Your ego takes a hit and you can make yourself feel worse before feeling better when engaging in such a process. But getting back with an ex will require you to put your pride aside and to figure out exactly where you went wrong and what pushed you to act a certain way
You need to give her space for three reasons: 1) People simply need space; if you can't give her any space, maybe that's something you can work on to show her that you've changed. 2) She'll get an opportunity to realize how good you are; not that she doesn't know this already, but she may not feel it in her bones. 3) You'll show her how independent you are on your own; the "rebel" is so attractive to women because he's totally on his own and doesn't need other people.
What I am going to share with you now is the most common reasons being men’s disappearing acts! As you read through this article, it’s essential that you understand that men are natural born hunters who enjoy the chase. If he is interested in having you as his girlfriend, he will show you this with his actions. Be careful to never settle for a man that isn’t giving you 100% with his actions but is saying everything with his words. This is where a lot of women run into trouble in their search for a good man. Pay attention to his actions more than his words.
I understand that I caused a lot of the fighting but how does someone just quit caring about someone they use to love who is carrying their child? It seems like he hates me. I’d like to ask him these things but I know I shouldn’t and honestly he probably wouldn’t even respond. Hopefully waiting 30 days will help but I’m feeling pretty hopeless at this point
One of the worst techniques at trying to make a man commit I see is women who use jealousy. The only thing this is going to lead to is many tears, arguments and your man walking away. Men like women who are completely loyal so don’t flirt with friends or strangers, don’t talk about ex-lovers you have been with even if he asks you and don’t be too mysterious so that you man starts thinking you’re having an affair.
Answer: Stop being so aggressive. The more you push, the more he is going to pull away. Give him some space to figure stuff out without all the questions and accusations. If you push him too far, you are going to lose him. If you take some of the pressure off, he may just find his way back to you. [Read: 20 glaring signs you have a control freak in you]

But not for the reason you think! Studies have shown that boys are more affectionate, even more expressive, than girls until they reach school age. At that time, social repression begins — of words, thoughts, feelings — and the desire for human connection goes underground. So taboo is this desire for intimacy that its possibility can terrify men; not because it's smothering, but because they realize how desperate they are for it.


Men don’t commit because they know they don’t have to. They know that you won’t leave them and even if you do leave,there will be some thirsty female out there that will be all too happy to pick up right where you left off. They believe that they are God’s gift to women. They will never realize that women are God’s gift to men. And most women do not recognize their value. And a large amount of women more than likely believe that they don’t have any.
Being together means facing situations together, and this could include a tragedy. Death, financial difficulties, job issues, problems with family are the things a couple face. When the guy just wants to be with you in a difficult time, he is ready to commit. Shah says, “In a relationship, there is a need for emotional security and bonding. This can be shown by either partner by being there — just standing with them or holding hands. This stage conveys a deeper level of relating to each other and also the security someone is there with them. It shows that the relationship has reached an emotional maturity by handling the strong emotions of each other in a balanced healthy way. This cements the relationship.”
I had a strong feeling for someone that I met on a dating site. He was witty and sharp. He came to meet me and it went well…he was a 2-hr. drive from me. It wasn’t so much an issue, we both felt….we kept calls and texts going. Soon, when I wouldn’t go to him on the lake (it was late and quite a drive at night), he began small, almost veiled pot-shots at me. It continued for one more text the next day, and I lowered the boom. Said that I was prob. falling in love with him and he was being hurtful…he immed. called and told me he “couldn’t do love with anyone.” “Could we just continue as we were?” I said not, that it would hurt too much. He turned on me and would never communicate again. Any thoughts?
Hey Ryan, so me and my ex were together for about 1.5 years and things were pretty great... we had the occasional disagreement but for the most part we seemed to be a good match, we traveled out of the country for her first time, went horseback riding, on cruises left each other notes confirming our affection to one another even got back into the church together. Somewhere we hit a rough patch as het best friend of 9 years confessed his love and it caused friction between us because she was not sure what to do with those feelings and it constantly caused arguments because I told her to cut him off which she tried but eventually refused. Funny thing is her parents wanted me to marry her, me and her mom even picked out a ring... she had even gotten off of birth control and we were trying to have a kid but it didn't happen. Eventually we got into an argument about her best friend again and we broke up... now she's dating him and they travel together and seem inseparable. She would still come and see me without him knowing and she said she loved us both but didn't want to lose him but didn't know what to do because she loved me to... she felt as if she was in two relationships but ultimately began spending less time with me and more with him. She is a very pretty girl which makes it harder because she can have her pick of the litter biiut I really care for her and don't really know what to do.... she wanted to meet for a closure outing before moving on which I began no contact at that point and it's been about a week and I've heard nothing from her... not sure how to proceed at this point
I have been wondering how to make him love me again, realise he made a mistake and give a second chance. It is even harder as he is in another country. Plus, I really don’t think the NC rule would work on him, because I have been the one who asks question in our relationship, who kept the conversation going when we lived apart for a few weeks. I believe if i implement it now, it will just give him the opportunity to move on, to forget me, because he has a lot going on otherwise (studies, friends, handball, parties…). Did i also ruin my chances by begging for it so much?

Exactly Why Guys Start Acting Distant All Of A Sudden (And What To Do About It) Why Men Pull Away: 3 Easy Ways To Stop A Man From Withdrawing: Infographic The Real Reasons Men Pull Away When They Are Falling In Love How To Tell If He’s Testing You By Pulling Away From You Why Men Pull Away In The Early Stages: How To Get Your New Guy Back The Real Reasons Why Men Pull Away After Getting Close
there’s a guy younger than me, very romantic, considerate, big heart, is looking for a girlfriend, he doesnt have alot of responsibility lives with his parents still. I hav kids and I want someone that is financially stable to take care of themselves first. I was honest and don’t want to get hurt or hurt him and if I get too close as friends I may want more. I told him maybey we shouldn’t talk and he didn’t understand what he did wrong. He hasn’t called me back. We work together, I want to be his friend, and since he… Read more »
(40 year old male/35 year old girlfriend/six year relationship that had two previous breaks) I broke up with my ex girlfriend in April. We lived together a year but fought often over our differences. She’s messy, I am clean. She pushed aggressively for marriage but I wanted to work through some of our problems first. She moved out but we remained in contact because I babysit her 4 year old. In September I made it known I still love her and wanted to try again. But because of the fights and because I was pretty mean to her towards the end she was not interested and moved on. She’s now with a new boyfriend (shoe she says she gets along better with) and possibly living with him. I got therapy and fixed things with myself but made the mistake of coming off as desperate. I sent a couple lengthy emails expressing how much I value her and how things would be different and a good amount of texts. I have since backed off. What do you think is the best course of action considering we broke up on such bad terms? She’s super negative about how she remembers things but when I asked if she would ever consider giving us a chance if things didn’t work out she said she would. What are your thoughts
 Change up your look. Making small changes to your hair or wardrobe can have a huge impact on your overall confidence and make you feel good about yourself. In fact, tweaking your external appearance can, amazingly, inspire the courage you need to make more substantial changes. Something as simple as honing your personal style can eventually lead to actions and choices that can improve your energy, satisfaction, and joy in life. Investing time and energy in making small improvements to your outer appearance makes you feel joyful, confident, and entirely yourself and will only lead to good things.
So you’ve just met a great guy who you feel like you have a great connection with. He’s attractive, smart and fits into your definition of “tall, dark and handsome.” You’ve probably been speaking with him for a while, but you’ve noticed something quite strange about him—the time it takes for him to respond to your messages and return your calls doubles with every interaction.
I have been seeing a guy for almost 3 months. From the start he said he wasn’t interested in a “full on serious relationship” and at that stage I wasn’t either. He then told me 5 weeks ago that he had feelings for me but wasn’t ready to commit to them yet. I was intoxicated and my reaction was “okay we should stop sleeping together/talking etc.” Up until this point it had been really perfect and he always replies asap, initiates to hang out etc. After this conversation he came back really strong without even a day in between where there was no contact and kept initiating plans e.g., going away together and paying for it. We didn’t sleep together for 2 weeks but as he lives with 4 of my best friends, we fell back into a sleeping together arrangement again and things pretty much went back to where they stopped. I had a conversation with him this week because I really wanted to know where I stand. He pretty much said that he didn’t want “rules” i.e., you can’t sleep with someone else, however for this time we would only sleep with each other and if we did sleep with someone else then we would have to tell each other and it would change what we have. I was happy with this. When it came to kissing other people, he said that because I wasn’t his girlfriend, I wouldn’t need to tell him if I kissed someone else because it would hurt him but if i were his girlfriend, he would want to know. I pretty much said I disagree and coming from a place of security that it would be nice to know that he wasn’t out kissing other girls. He doesn’t’ go out much either which he used to try and reassure me. I told him that due to the living situation and fear of getting hurt I may want to remove myself from the situation.
Yes! Master this, and life becomes easier because you are living life, instead of ‘auditioning’ as Natasha sometimes refers to. When you realise who you are and what you’re worth, you become authentic through self acceptance. Only then will you be truly ‘seen’ by others. And only then will you tell the users and abusers to move on, because you won’t value the shi* they have to offer. Because you will know your own worth.
Hi I have been dating my boyfriend for two years now he used to be like the best thing ever made be feel loved like never before. But of recent he got in to medical school and it started stressing him out and he started giving me less attention and I was actually going through a lot during this period and he was so busy that he wasn’t giving me attention so I started complaining and fighting with him a lot and asking for more attention but eventually he started avoiding me and every time I am with him and his not doing what I want I would start crying and I could feel him drifting away more and more then I spoke to him one night and he said he was indifferent about the relationship and wants us to be friends I cried so much and begged him for a second chance he actually really cares for me this Part I know out of pity he gave me a second chance then a few days ago he sent a random text saying his sorry he ever hurt me and he loves me so much but he still doesn’t call or text me much it hurts cause I really love him and I don’t want to loose i just need advice on what to do because all I want to do is talk to him every time but I don’t want to chock him and if his online and doesn’t text me I start to feel like he doesn’t want to talk to me the thing is how do i give him space and still make him love me as much as he used to
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