“I have been a mental health therapist in Denver, Colorado, for over 20 years.  I have been a guide for healing and growth for thousands of clients.  Because I have been a witness to the transformation of many lives, I can tell you that anything, and everything in your life- your “broken”, your “stuck”, your “absolutely nevers” can all be transformed into the most beautiful light….Promise. This includes your ability to find love.”
If you’re really worried that your ex is going to get into a new relationship, or you know he’s in one and you want to find out whether it’s real or not, this article will give you the signs that his new relationship is a rebound. That way, you can get a definitive answer to the question, “Is he in a rebound relationship?” and move on with putting the no contact rule to work for you.
Want to know the quickest way to get your guy to commit? Hint about your ex popping back into your life, and watch your guy squirm! Even if you blocked your ex from your phone five years ago, you can still casually mention his name if you want to ruffle your guy’s feathers a bit. Simply tell him your ex has been emailing you and hinting at getting back together. Adding a little bit of competition to this dating game definitely won’t hurt!
Getting back on his feet involved reconnecting with old friends, and making contact with new ones as he pursued interests in activities he enjoyed. He joined a book group, found a place with religious services that he liked. He recalled the sports activities that in better times, he used to enjoy and returned to doing those activities again. Bit by bit, his spirits lifted.
Think beyond dinner and after-drinks for your next date. "The best type of date allows you to stop texting, put the phone down, and really foster a deep connection," Kelman says. Restaurants can be nice, but try something a little outside your comfort zone from time to time. Check out a craft beer festival, see a local band at some hole-in-the-wall, or challenge him to a mountain bike race. A new adventure can fortify your relationship since it gives you shared memories to reminiscence about later, and that stronger bond will increase the likelihood he'll want to keep seeing you, exclusively.
I JUST went thru this with my boyfriend of almost a year. He got VERY distant for 2 weeks and when I pushed him to find out what was up, he said he was 50/50 about our relationship and needed time to think. So I gave it to him and NEVER reached out again. I didnt even sign into social media, I wanted him to have no idea what I was up to. After 2 weeks of no contact, he texted me today pouring his heart out about how he messed up and all he thought about was me, etc etc. Everything I’ve only ever dreamed of him saying and he NEVER says his feelings towards me, but has always shown them in affection. We are meeting tonight after he begged to see me to talk. I still can’t believe he admitted he was scared that he messed things up and realized he was throwing away a good thing. We still have a lot to work out, but I think this is a great start. Hang in there everyone who is going thru the same thing!
my ex and I had been together for 3 years(last year of highschool to third year of college-different cities).I broke things of two months ago because we would get intimate rarely the last two month,and when I asked him why,he replyed that we both gained weight and he can't see me as sexually as he used to, but he still didn't want to break up and wanted to work things out,but I was too emotional to think about it then. For the next month after the breakup he still said he wanted me. We saw each other about two weeks ago, and he started being a bit weird... he said he still loves me but doesn't want to be in a relationship with anyone, but we can still have sex, or that he is sure that if we took our clothes right then and there we would have sex,or asking me how would i feel if he told me togive him a hug... I told him I still love him and I am not iterested in him being just someone I talk to and occationally have sex with,and if sex was what I wanted,I can find it anywhere I want. Then he started being friendly for a bit,then giving me the cold shoulder the next day. I looked sad and a bit clingy,but didn't beg or acted needy. I recently learned from common a friend that he told her "if she doesn't want me once,I don't want her a hundred times" when she asked how are things between us. To this day we still keep in touch and are on very friendly terms (we used to be very good friends for years before we became lovers) and he usually reaches out,although I'm trying to take some disdance and don't always reply him. I still want after all these things to be with him,and it's not that I just miss him,or the idea of being in a relationship. I miss him for who he is. I really can't understand if it is just a phase or he really doesn't want me. I am willing to try work things out (but not changing my body or myself just to fit his standards as I would never demand that of him) if I see interest from his part,but his behaviour confuses me. what should I do? He is also coming back to our hometown for three days,and asked me to go out for drinks at a place we both used to work and I said ok... I am not sure if it was the right thing to do,or if he will friendzone me if I go out with him for drinks on friendly terms... I don't know what to do...
"Going away on a trip just the two of you is always the best idea when you feel like your relationship needs a 'spark.' Of course it is easier for the French couples who get easily seven weeks off per year! But jokes aside, nothing is as effective as three days without the children somewhere other than home (Lisbon? Copenhagen? New Orleans?). Suddenly, you might remember why you are together.
The more your guy says “I love you” then more he will come to terms with it and realize that you are an important person in his life. If at first he refuses to say those 3 words and instead compliments you or says something like “isn’t is obvious” after you have asked whether he loves you, tell him that it would mean more if he said those 3 little words.

If both you and your ex are on the same page then there really shouldn’t be a reason why you can’t go back for some fun once in a while. In saying that, this is rarely the case. In my opinion it’s best to stay away: if you’re just after a bit of fun, then download Tinder. Avoid any situations where people could potentially get their feelings hurt, no matter how little harm you think it can do at the time.
I’m not sure what to do at this point. I didn’t reply. I havent since. It has been a day. Is there coming back from this? Is the “its ok” a good or bad thing? Could she be so done that this is now meaningless and doesn’t really matter to her? Or is this a positive “its ok”? What should i do now? Should i try to crawl back in? Should i wait a week? Or is it done? Rn i feel I should wait a few days.. but I don’t know.
The best relationship advice I have for men is to understand how important communication is. Problems and cracks can often start to appear between two people when things aren’t being communicated. Often these issues, niggles or situations can be sorted – but only if you are both honest in a way that is respectful to each other. Men should also understand that being listened to is so important for women. If your partner tells you something is bothering them, even if it seems completely unreasonable to you, hear her out and don’t get defensive.
Wow!! All I can say is thank you for writing. You have an awesome way of saying things, straight to the point no BS. This is what people need I tell all my friends about anew mode, lol I even quote some things you say on Facebook. I’ve been married for twelve years and I love reading your articles because it makes me a better person, wife lover!! Thanks again!
My boyfriend broke up with me over a month ago. He won't answer my calls or texts and blocked me on Facebook. I am trying so hard to stop contacting him via text but it's hard because we talked everyday for six months. I cry and miss him terribly and he won't talk to me. I am trying to hard to do the 30 day no contact rule. my email is girl8eliza@hotmail.com
Hello! So my ex boyfriend broke up with me officially 16 days ago. We're both 27, by the way. 10 days prior he told me that he needed time alone and that he was not in a good place. I was supposed to meet him that day (we live in different cities, but only one hour apart), and I asked if I could still come, or if he never wanted to see me again. He said that he never said that, but he would prefer not to see me for at least a few days. I texted him two days later saying that I understand and he should take his time and he responded with thank you xx. I did not reach out for 10 days and then I texted him asking him to tell me what was on his mind. He replied instantly and said that it's not my fault and that he feels he can not be in a relationship right now. I asked for an explanation and to tell me what was going on in his life, he said he didn't want to talk in detail, it was about the way he felt in general, work, the kid (he has an 8 year old son) and that I never did anything wrong. He apologised and I said take care. I never texted him, we met on tinder and had been dating for 5 months. I met his entire family, his close friends and he met mine. My birthday was two weeks before the break and he brought me a heart necklace with diamonds on it (it took him a while to find a present he liked), I know he has feelings for me, he said so himself, but I am so confused. A part of me says he will be back, another one feels he will not, I just don't know. Should I add his best friend's girlfriend on Facebook? She did tell me her Facebook, but then this happened and I did nothing. I know his friends and family like me. We were good together but the last time he was a bit distant.
The best study I know is where three groups of depressed people are put on a regime of anti-depressants, exercise or a combination of the two. No surprise to know that all three groups were happier, but did it last? Six months later, the group who had been treated with exercise only, had a very low relapse rate of 9%. The other two groups had relapsed and how! Their rates were ranging from 38% to 31%, so about a third of them were now depressed again.

“I feel great that I’m hearing from you again”…is that a joke? You DON’T feel great that they treat you like that. Don’t be a doormat, it’s NOT OK to leave someone hanging, & saying that just allows them to get away with that kind of behaviour and think shelving you like a toy til they feel like playing with you again is OK. You’re better off acting disinterested & telling them flat out sorry but I’m not into that kinda thing, so you’ll have to put more effort in if you want me to stick around or I’m just going to assume you’re not interested and move on with my life. Do not allow people to treat you that way and reward bad behaviour by getting excited & happy they suddenly decide to return. Be true to yourself.
Where did I come up with this? Actually this really happened to me. I was dating a girl and after we broke up I happened to run into her at a Starbucks and even though we had a short friendly conversation I couldn’t take my eyes off of her because she just looked so gorgeous. She looked so good in fact that all I could think was “how in the hell did I let her get away?”
It’s amazing what you can see with a little bit of time and distance. You might find you’re happier without him, that you can breathe easier, that you’re more like yourself again and maybe you realize getting back together with him isn’t a good idea. Or maybe a little time away causes you to see his good qualities that you took advantage of during the relationship. Maybe now you’re better able to support his vision for the future whereas you weren’t on board before. Whatever the case, sometimes you need to step away from something to see it more clearly.
Now, here’s the problem with you getting married to Buddy: it’s not something you want to commit to. Buddy still hasn’t gotten his career together enough, and there are issues in the dynamics that you don’t feel good about. Maybe it’s because you really just don’t see him as husband material (since you barely see him as boyfriend material) and him being a whiny doormat to get his way hasn’t helped this a bit.
Everything went well…we were soo deep in conversations…but the only thing we did was we dint confide each other that we were in love with each other….i was too afraid to….and he loves texting me often…and he says im damn cute in my photos…pulls my leg often…and we chat day and night…he says im his bestiee…all of a sudden he started replying me in one word texts like ohhh’s and hmm’s which drove me mad….i dunno wat conclusion to make…may be he has found me boring and too available….i love him soo much and it really hurts if he doesn’t chat with me as before….i went offline for a month…and going offline will make him miss me??? Will that make him crave for my presence!! Pls…help me somebody..im dying everyday
If you’re going through this situation right now, don’t worry, you’re not alone. Getting a guy to commit seems like one of the hardest things in the world. We’ve all heard stories about men being commitment-phobes who are deathly afraid of having their independence ripped away for them, so you can’t really blame the guy for dragging his feet when it comes to locking you down, can you?
Trust in your instinct. If something doesn't feel right, try not to force it. If you text or call him and he doesn't return your message, then resist the urge to contact him again. I know it can be very frustrating when this happens, but never see it as a reflection of who you are. It just means this person has not seen the true value in you and you deserve far better than that. We all do.
My boyfriend and i have been together for 1 year and 1 month. He goes to a different school and he starts talking to this new girl. Just days before, he kept on reassuring me that he wanted to be forever and he is not going to leave me for anybody else. So i thought that he meant it. I feel like he really does love me deep down inside but he just doesn't want to say anything. I love him with all of my heart and he cheated on me and then i begged him to get back with me. I know that that is backwards because usually when someone cheats, they want to get back with their spouse. but he didnt want to. After we had the fight about cheating, we started to talk. So i started to google signs that your ex wants you back. He would tell me their status, he said that they are not dating but they are talking but on all of her instagram pics, she now tags him. I said that i love him and he said that he loves me too. He then blocked me on instagram and snapchat and if i text him he will leave me on read. I know that i deserve better but i love him and i am in love with him. What do i do?
We dated for over 8 months. Everything seemed like we were going in a good direction. We both introduced each other to family. Which is huge and serious. But one day after a small argument he tells me that we should break up. Out of the blue. Said that he’s feelings for me changed that he didn’t see us in the future that we should be friends. I think that he has commitment issues since he’s never been able to keep a long relationship before me. We always made it a joke and now that joke has me hurting. Last time I talk to him we had a civil conversation where I kinda pleaded to him that we should try some mire that things can work. He said give him time to think and that he’ll text me. It’s been a week. What’s going through his mind? What should I do? Is it over for good? Did he tell me he’ll think about it just to be nice? Will he ever come back?

Hi Chris – My boyfriend (well now ex boyfriend) of 2 years just broke up with me a week ago. He is 33, I am 25. We met on the mountain, ski coaching to be exact. He does it full time (Tuesdays – Sundays) while I only do it part time along with my full time job (November – April, 7 days a week). A co-worker of ours set us up. We had been coaching with each other for a couple of years by that point and she could just see that we were perfect for each other. I was a little hesitant at first, I had never dated someone who what that much older than me. But when I was with him, it never seemed weird or like we were at a different point in our lives. The first year was bliss, we were not living with each other at that point so we were constantly looking forward to seeing each other. There was excitement.
I know how frustrating it can be when you’re ready to take the relationship to the next level, and figuring out how to get your man to commit, but he just keeps putting it off or giving you lame excuses. Because I have lived it and got my man to commit, it’s only fair that I share all my secrets on how to make a man commit so you can too have your prince charming.
Interpret your emotions. In the pain and confusion of a breakup, it can be easy to confuse your emotions, interpreting feelings of loneliness and hurt as evidence that you need your ex back in your life. In fact, almost everyone who experiences a breakup initially feels remorse for the lost relationship, coupled with feelings of anxiety, guilt, depression, and loneliness. Generally, the more serious the relationship was, the more severe these feelings tend to be; couples who are married or cohabiting tend to have the worst breakups, whereas those who were casually dating tend to have an easier time in the aftermath of a breakup.[1] But the severity of your feelings does not automatically mean that you should get back together with your ex.
Sometimes you can use social media to your advantage. One of the best ways to make a man miss you is by being independent. Let Mr. Right see this new, independent you via social media. Are you taking a cooking class or finally checking skydiving off your bucket list? Make sure you share it with your friends and that special someone. Do not fabricate elaborate, fake posts. Be you, be fun, and be authentic. He will want to be by your side for every new adventure. Guys want to make sure you have a life outside of him and what better way to show him this than by sharing your adventures with him, indirectly. If you’re on your phone constantly sending him images of all the fun you’re having it’s not going to be at all effective. Usually, when you’re having fun with your friends sending the guy in your life images isn’t something that should interest you because you’re busy doing you. So use your social media to update everyone of the fun you’re having and this will drive him crazy.
Let things progress naturally and look at the evidence: Does he try to see you whenever he's free? Does he seem genuinely interested in what you have to say? Does he have as much fun on dates as you do? These are likely signs he's in it for real, so enjoy being with him and relax about making things "official." "Men who are wary of commitment want to feel like they're the one choosing to be with you—they don't want to feel like they're being coaxed into a cage," Trespicio adds.
Stef Safran, is “Chicago’s Introductionista” and owner of Stef and the City. She’s a matchmaking and dating expert in Chicago. She’s been in the business for over 14 years, starting with recruiting contestants on “The Dating Game.” She founded Stef and the City in 2009 and have been featured in media outlets such as; the Huffington Post, Chicago Sun-Times, The Chicago Tribune, ABC7, NBC5, CBS2, WGN, Fox32 News, ABC7’s “Windy City Live”, WCIU’s “You and Me This Morning,” Time Out Chicago and more!
Jasbina Ahluwalia is a Matchmaker/Dating Coach, Radio Show host & founder of Intersections Match by Jasbina – the only Matchmaking & Online Dating Support Firm in North America & the U.K. for Indian Singles. A finalist in OPRAH’S search for a TV Host, she’s also been featured in the New York Times, San Jose Mercury News, Chicago Tribune, Washington Post & Entrepreneur Magazine.

None of this is to excuse men pulling away, and this covers only some men. But it does explain why many, many men feel more comfortable with their “hanging buddies” — who are in all the same predicaments they are — more than they feel comfortable with they women in their lives. I think many men both desire and feel profoundly uncomfortable with women, and terrified of being judged. Because they’ve already judged themselves.
You should stop begging or acting desperate in wanting her back because all you're doing is pushing her further away and scaring her off. If she really has someone she likes now and intends to pursue it, there isn't much you can do but to go into no contact and start working on recovery first before you even consider an action plan to win her back.
I've been applying the no-contact rule for a month now. (Broke up 9/1/18, didn't start NC till 9/18/18, before that had dated for 5 years 34yo(me) and 24(her)). I'm feeling better, I have no idea how she is feeling. My initial plan was to do a long no contact, like 3 months, because she was extremely adamant about the breakup and is a very determined girl in general (It was a loss of connection and attraction dumping, btw). And I think she wanted to experience a period of being single since she's been locked up in various relationships basically forever, which influenced me to think the longer period would be wise.
It would depend on the circumstances of why she decided to break up now of all times, whether its because she gradually felt less towards you, or if there was someone else. Typically, a long distance relationship would be harder to win back because the main cause of most breakups here is the lack of physical proximity, which can't be changed unless one party goes over. If her trip at the year end is a long or permanent one, there would probably still be a chance for you to win her back if you're able to reach out successfully, but if it's just for a holiday, you might want to consider walking away because the same result may eventually occur where she loses feelings again down the road.
We tried to be friends for 3 weeks because I missed him terribly and I thought it helped me (and him) manage the pain as we text and call all the time, but last weekend, we ended up kissing and making out. I called him to ask him what this means, and if he is standing by his decision to be with the other woman, and he says he has no comment on his decision as he's equally as confused himself.
This is by far the best article I’ve ever read in my entire life about relationships and how to understand a man. This article would definitely help my BFF understand this as she is the clingiest, neediest & most insecure person ever & fails relationship after relationship. The only thing she says is: “I’m a good person why I can’t get a good man for myself?”. She praises herself endlessly but, when She finally lands a guy, she’s suffocated them so much that they end up leaving her. And believe it or not, as a friend, that’s really hard to watch when u see your BFF being dumped especially when she asks why… That’s when this article comes in. This article should have her name on it.
Exactly! Also, can we all admit that pulling away really isn’t that normal in strong and solid relationships? Looking back, I realize that my best relationships did not involve a man pulling away from me. Maybe having a day or two to himself for alone time, sure, but pulling away and creating real emotional distant? No…it’s not normal and yes there is a problem…any time that happened to me, another woman was involved.
Keep the mystery alive. When they just start seeing someone, why do some gals bombard guys with questions and try to learn everything about them straight away? If you do this, you’ll know everything about each other too soon and there’ll be nothing left to find out. Don’t ask too many questions right away and don’t offer information about yourself unless he asks. The chase will be more interesting for him this way.
Hi, my boyfriend of 4+ years broke up with me. We went through about 2 months worth of breaking up. Sleeping in motels, gradually moving out back into my step-dads. We were basically married without the paperwork. His family called me their daughter-in-law, we shared bank accounts, bought a car together. And one day after a stupid argument, he woke up and said he wasn't happy. My whole world collapsed. Yeah I know we had problems here and there, but nothing serious enough to actually break-up over. I was shocked. He said he had warned me here and there about things, but I guess I didn't take it seriously enough. Had I known I would have never let this happen. He said he couldn't anymore. I had hurt him too much and he resented me too much to let go and move forward. I feel like I addressed my mistakes and apologized, but he didn't let me show him how I would try to fix them. Now he has finally dropped off the rest of my stuff, and our cat we got together, at the place Im staying at now. When we hugged and said goodbye I could feel him shaking but he still pushed me away. When he walked out the door he did turn around and wave with tears in his eyes, but he still left. He still would rather not be with me, than be with me. I want him back so bad, I know we are good for each other. Im willing to do anything. Will your system work? Should I try anymore? Is there even a chance?
If you can’t get along with his friends, the chances of him making you his girlfriend are slim. To most guys, getting approval from their buddies is very important, and they want to make sure the people who are closest to them approve of their new romance. If his friends think you’re annoying and rude, it may make your guy back off and run from you for good.
Italiano: Tornare Assieme alla tua Ex, Español: hacer que tu ex novia vuelva, Deutsch: Seine Ex Freundin zurückgewinnen, Português: Conquistar a sua Ex Namorada de Volta, Français: récupérer son ex petite amie, Русский: вернуть свою бывшую девушку, 中文: 让你的前女友回心转意, Nederlands: Je ex vriendin terugkrijgen, Čeština: Jak získat svoji expřítelkyni zpět, हिन्दी: अपनी एक्स गर्लफ़्रेंड को वापस पाएँ, ไทย: กลับไปคืนดีกับแฟนสาวคนเก่าของคุณ, العربية: استرجاع حبيبتك السابقة, 한국어: 전 여자친구를 되찾는 법

If you’ve been looking for dating tips that really work, then trust me to help you get the love life you deserve. Matthew is one of the world's most acclaimed relationship coaches and a New York Times best selling author. He was on the NBC show 'Ready For Love' and has helped millions of women across the world find what their heart has truly desired. Join Matthew and over 85 million women just like you to get the best dating tips online.
You know something is wrong if you are always crying or feeling bad about what has happened and you can quite get over it.  You also know it can be frustrating when you can seem to figure out what to text or what to say to your ex bf.  Well, the solution is you can join my Private Facebook Support Group and/or pick up your copy of the Texting Bible and get the emotional support and answers your need.
As a couple, you may be with each other for a year or three years and when you look back, your best memories are of you both together. The realisation that you have had some of the best times together is a great one. Sawnani says, “It’s a very strange and nice feeling when you realise that even though the quantum of time spent with someone maybe lesser than the time spent with family or others, the contentment is a lot more. We all know that sometimes an hour feels like a minute and sometimes like a whole day... It is when the togetherness moments start becoming important that you take the relationship to the next level.” 6 You visit his house, meet the family When the guy invites you over to his place, it’s a huge milestone. He could also agree to come to your place to meet your family. Inviting you over means he wants to let you into his world and meet his folks. Shah explains, “Meeting your family shows he is serious about you. When he invites you over, he wants his family to see you and expects you to bond with his family. He is making you aware of his home life, traditions, culture, family environment and habits. In short, he is giving you a microscopic view of his own life, his beliefs of family structures and wants to know what you feel about it.”
Whatever you do, don’t shut your guy down or get defensive every time he has an opinion you don’t agree with. Being in a relationship means that you should both respect each other’s opinions and decisions. How can you ever expect your man to talk to you about his commitment issues when you cry, get upset or go defensive and angry when you or him bring the subject up.
I need advice though. During one breakup he slept with someone else and came back saying how he realized he was in love with me etc. Although we were technically broken up we were still seeing and spending time with each other. Also being intimate. I’m really trying to move past this but his most recent pulling away has made me insecure and really psycho. We’re both older 39 and 41 professionals. His job is much more consuming and he has a lot in his life right now but says I add additional stress when really I just need reassurance (I know I have my own issues).
One of the dating tips for women we hear a lot is not to let a man know you like him, or to play hard to get. Well, that’s just wrong. Sure, a little mystery may be sexy in the beginning, but the game gets old fast. Even research shows that playing too much hard-to-get makes others like you less. At a certain point, you just have to let the man know you’re interested.
Invest in sharing your message thoughtfully, clearly, respectfully (self-respect and respect to the party involved). Seek to be understood, and most importantly, invest in understanding what your partner is trying to share with you. This will build a secure foundation in love, respect and fulfillment for you and the one you love. “Trust is the glue of life. It’s the most essential ingredient in effective communication. It’s the foundational principle that holds all relationships.” – Stephen Covey 
“I realize that it’s early in the relationship to bring this up, but I want commitment. If you can’t commit to me in full, then understand that I will continue to date other women while seeing you,” he says. “I want a wife, and I’m not going to stop dating until there’s a girl wearing my ring. If you can’t handle this, I’m sorry, but we will cut our date short now. I don’t want to waste your time.”

I was in a fwb relationship with a man that I’m compatible with. But his ex wife and ex gf of 14 years both cheated on him. He never wants to date or have a relationship again. He says he’s un loveable too. It breaks my heart because I’m very much in love with him. He brok up with me 2 years ago because he knew I was in love with him without saying. We hadn’t talked again til last week. We had wonderful exciting sex. He said he hadn’t been with anyone in a long time.
Go out with friends and tell him about it. Start having nights out with your friends instead of date nights, and then tell your guy all about how much fun you had. He will probably be happy for you, but he’ll also be a bit jealous of how much fun you can have without him. If you spend a couple weekends having fun with friends, you’re guy will soon start to miss being the person that's having fun with you.
The best relationship advice I can give you is to never stop seducing her. One of the biggest mistakes guys make is to stop being the seducer as soon as a girl calls them her boyfriend. A real seducer knows that the beginning of a relationship is not the end of a seduction. It is just an interstation that craves for a change of playing the game, but the game still remains the same.
Have you ever caught a whiff of something and a person or place came to mind? It can be the lightest smell that brings you back to a certain time in your life. That is because our sense of smell is attached to our memory. Certain smells will always be associated to different memories in our brain. If you want a man to miss you, bringing up those happy memories of your past will do just that. Be sure that you wear your personal scent every time you see him. Each time the smell hits his nose, you will come to mind. It might also be a good idea to spritz a little bit of that scent around his house but be discrete. He shouldn’t see you doing this for obvious reasons. If you leave your scent around his house he’s going to have a hard time getting you off his mind and not missing you.
My boyfriend of 7 years wanted to take a break so that we can focus on ourselves for a while. He said he was doing it for me and that it wasn’t a break up just a break. I didn’t hear from him for a week and I couldn’t take it anymore so I texted him a week later asking if he’s done with me to let me know and he told me he was happy where he was and thought it was best to not get back together. And this was all over text so I told him if we end it to end it in person so we met up the next day and we talked and ended it maturely but I just didn’t understand because we were so good together. He told me he was happy throughout our relationship but felt “trapped” which I didn’t understand but anyways just last week I logged into his Instagram account and saw a message from a girl calling him babe. So I texted him and told him “I hope _____ makes you happy, don’t ever speak to me again.” And of course he didn’t reply back. I’m so hurt, and felt so insecure because this whole time I thought I was the problem but it turns out he didn’t want to be with me because he was catching feelings for someone else..
Making your man commit can take time and effort. You want to send him signals that you are ready to take the relationship further but at the same time don’t want to overdo it so it becomes an obsession or pressurizing. Don’t let the relationship become boring, keep an element on fun and excitement in it by doing something new together, going on nights out or trying something new in the bedroom.
Made me decide that I did not want my ex back! I already new that, but thought after 4 years of being with them, maybe I should try. But it does have some helpful stuff, but deep down everyone know these things already. Don't agree with the no contact advice, but maybe some ppl need to hear this and use it. I had no reason to contact him or even a desire to. We were just too far apart on important issues and was my ex was unwilling to change, my ex wanted me to change my core beliefs to theirs. There are some good advice about learning about yourself in the book and everyone should know that no one can make u happy but yourself! I am glad this person is out of my life, and have met a very nice person with similar goals, wants and needs as I. So remember ppl there are lots of men and women out there, and one is just waiting for you! But they are not going to come knocking on your door, get out there and meet new ppl!

The problem is that I have been focusing on the negative part of marriage, not speaking to anyone about my failed marriage and pretending everything is okay by putting up fake smiles. My husband transformed into a beast, cheater and abuser. It was unbearable to see a man who once vowed to shield us as family transfer aggression to me and the kids, pushing us hard to the wall. But there is time, reason and season for everything either good or bad. I ran to Dr. Onokuna for salvation which I eventually achieved through his extra ordinary spell. Our differences were settled and every heart wounds healed within 2 weeks. I am grateful my husband transformed again to an angel which he has always been. Thanks to you sir, your works are so marvelous.
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